Cost of Racecations

I got a really nice compliment from my coworker today. She said I'm looking good in the body. And the skin too. I feel so much gratitude that I have the resources to spend on running and running-related travel. I know it's not the end of the year (yet). But I thought it would be interesting to look at how much we spent in our "startup" year compared to the following year. I told myself I wouldn't need to buy new stuff as much in 2025 since I already had most of the things I would need to complete a marathon.

TOTAL SPENDING IN 2024 = $6549

• Disneyland 5k 2024 $1466
• LA Big 5k 2024 $284
• OC Marathon 2024 $522
• CdM Scenic 5k 2024 $640
• SMC Classic 10k 2024 $1063
• Mission Inn Run 2024 $1075
• Holiday Half Marathon 2024 $1499

TOTAL SPENDING IN 2025 = $6476

• LA Marathon 2025 $1366
• Rose Bowl Half 2025 $724.11
• CdM Scenic 5k 2025 $1749.42
• Cookie Mile 2025 $35
• Bimbo Global 10k 2025 FREE
• Mission Inn Run 10k 2025 $1804.95
• Clueless and Breathless Half 2025 $35
• Random Clothing, Hats, Sunglasses $462
• Shoes $301

PROJECTED SPENDING IN 2026...

• 1/11 Citrus Heritage Run $676
• 1/18 Rose Bowl Half 2026 $126.42
• 2/15 Palm Desert Half 2026 $80.50 registration + $249.00 hotel
• 3/8 LA Marathon $1448.47
• 6/10 Epic Sister Camping / Disneyland Trip $2000+
• 8/1 Nebraska Family Reunion $2000+
• 9/27 - Bimbo Global Race 10k
• 10/18 - Mission Inn Run 10k - $120 registration
• 10/24 - Nike Women's Half

PROJECTED SPENDING IN 2027... 

• 1/17 - Rose Bowl Half $109.40 registration
• 3/7 - LA Marathon $363.69 registration + LARR membership + photo package

I didn't join Sparkle Squad for the 2025-26 season. I didn't renew my Strava subscription. I kind of miss it but also kind of not. Definitely the Sparkle Squad was an opportunity to spend more via the facebook group and little gift exhanges throughout the year. But I do kind of miss the features of the Strava subscription, I almost renewed it yesterday when I tried to access the heatmap for the purposes of route planning and I couldn't see street-level details. But I also miss when it would tell you "Athlete Intelligence" about something it noticed about your run. Usually it would say something encouraging like, wow that was a lot of climbing, or you really pushed your pace. It felt like I had a friend encouraging me for what was new or improved with each training session.

I guess what I'm trying to do right now is let go of the Palm Desert Half. I've never done it before and if I did it, I could get another medal for the Run Riverside County Challenge. I skipped Every Woman's Marathon 2025, and I'm okay with it since I was awarded a greater teaching load mid-semester. I thought it would be a nice trip, out to Palm Desert. But now I do have my Spring 2026 teaching schedule. Haha. Looks like I'll be running a marathon every Tuesday and Thursday.

SPRING 2026 TEACHING SCHEDULE

• MW 09:30am-12:20pm
• TR 09:30am-12:20pm
• TR 1:00pm-01:50pm
• TR 02:30pm-05:20pm

It's uncertain whether RunClub+ will continue for Spring 2026. I will be making enough from my CSUN units, so I don't really need the income from the side hustle, but it is nice to have the support from the other moms in the group. I am trying to unsubscribe from disney influencers because I don't want FOMO. I'm close to unsubscribing from LARR as well because they keep talking about this half-marathon and that drumstick dash. I'm trying to enjoy the races I signed up for and run the training runs. The actual race day doesn't feel as special when you're running a world major every other weekend. I enjoyed the Bimbo Global race a lot more than I thought I would. I enjoyed the Mission Inn Run a lot less than I thought I would.

I want to do the Mission Inn Run in 2026 because they have a legacy program. I would get a loyalty item, such as a hat, and a 3-year pin! I could put the pin on my patch jacket. It did work well to have our son stay with his grandma. However, kiddo was already nervous about Thanksgiving because he thought we would be dropping him off at grandma's again for an overnight. He said he was scared about that and didn't want to be away from us. So I would consider that when planning the potential Palm Desert Half and any other races for 2026. I'm glad I didn't sign up for the Holiday Half, even though that race was very special to me last year.

My motivation for running is to set a good example for my son. I took a few days off from my training plan, and I noticed that I had a noticeable drop in gratitude and joy. I had an increase in resentment and feelings of being disgruntled. I stayed home on Sunday when I would normally be out running and it was like I was in the way of my husband and the routine he's established with our son, they have some stuff that they enjoy doing together on Sunday while I'm out on my long run. So, I guess, it's become ingrained as a long-term pattern now that we've been doing this for two years. I really remember Thanksgiving weekend 2023 as the first runs leading up to the Disneyland 5k 2024.

As far as traditions this holiday season, I think we're going to just stick to training and our weekly routine and not do much else. Like, yes, bake cookies at home. But no, we're not planning to do any elaborate holiday light display that you have to pay to get into. I am still taking advantage of Buy Nothing to get things that are new to me, but also free. Yes, I have been stockpiling gifts for Albert to open on Christmas, which, by the way, we have no plans for. About half the gifts are games, which we can play at home. Running and doing my training is bringing me joy. And I look forward to returning to Fit4Mom in-person classes with Albert over winter break. I would also like to go rollerskating or ice skating at least once.

August 2025 in Review

It's only a few days into September, but it's been a whirlwind the past couple weeks. I have to pause and remind myself that Albert has only been in Kindergarten for three weeks (as he reminded me today is day 14). I have only had one week of school so far. Since I'm teaching labs, there are no class meetings this week since it is the week of a Monday holiday (Labor Day), so that no sections fall behind. When I look back at what we did during August, I can see why I feel so whirly.

The month kicked off with the Dopey Strong 7 Dwarves Challenge. Each day, we were supposed to dress up like a different dwarf and add a few strength moves into our running plan. Then on the 7th day we were supposed to do all the strength moves. I'm not a big fan of run streaking but there were only three days in the month that I didn't at least walk a mile (Aug 8, 10, 12). Sometimes I wonder why I track everything, but then I remember that tracking helps me make sense of the pain I'm in when I can't understand or remember why my feet hurt so much.

  

There was also a collaboration between Valley Runners and the Goodr Cabana. A group of us from Glendale, Sherman Oaks, Northridge, Winnetka, Burbank (all over the 818) met in Venice Beach every Saturday throughout August.

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And to end the month, Crowned Athletics inspired us to dress up for World Princess Week.

I had fun with the challenge, and it got me to do some micro-blogging reflecting on what the Disney princesses mean to me.

CREATIVITY. As a mom, I get creative with my son as we paint, build, dance, cook, sing, and play. As a teacher, I find creative ways to incorporate all that into a college environment. Keeping everyone's spirits up while still enforcing safety rules and regulations. Chemistry doesn't have to be boring! I've got a dream. I want to make chemistry accessible to all students, allowing them to enjoy and learn. 👩‍🔬🥼🥽🧪 Rebel princess 👸✊ My first thought of creativity was Rapunzel, who had to pass away the hours locked away in a tower. But I think I'm a rebel princess at heart. Every day, finding creative ways to resist the empire. @crownedathletics #spacebuns #onebadmotherrunner

STRENGTH in motherhood is sometimes carrying your child, carrying your 50 lb folded stroller as you board the bus, bringing in the entire load of groceries from the car to the house in one haul. 🛒🛍️ Sometimes strength in motherhood is breaking generational trauma, escaping the unreasonable expectations of society, and giving other women a leg up. We all show our strength in different ways, and sometimes just showing up as the best version of you takes strength. 🥂 🙌 Here's a high five to celebrate all of the invisible unpaid domestic labor. Sometimes we carry the weight of the family on our shoulders, And even though every day isn't a ball, We still find big and small ways to sparkle and shine through. Thank you for being a part of my family, And thank you for helping to keep me inspired! #gratitude #strengthinmotherhood If I could add one piece to my Powerful Hermana set, it would be the Force Fighter flow tank top. 🛸💫🚀 I recently introduced my son to the Star Wars movies, and I was so inspired by Rey Skywalker. I'm not sure if she is considered a princess, but she is definitely a role model of strength. She never stopped fighting for freedom, and she never lost hope. No family is perfect, but finding your identity and drawing strength from your ancestors has always been a powerful force for me.

KINDNESS. The story of The Little Mermaid reminds us to practice kindness with our own bodies. There may be some part of your body that you wish were different. #bodypositive Ariel is doomed to want something she cannot have. She is willing to gamble her voice in exchange for the opportunity to experience her heart's desire, but only for 3 days. And if she is unable to achieve a nearly impossible task, she loses everything. The mermaid princess reminds us to appreciate everything our bodies can do. Today I am grateful for my legs. 🦵🧜‍♀️ 🐚🐠 Thank you, legs, for being my favorite form of transportation. Today I am thankful for my voice. 🎵🎶👩‍🎤 Thank you, voice, for allowing me to express myself. Staying inspired is sometimes a challenge. I have to do whatever motivates me to get out there and stick to my training plan. 

BELLA IN SELLA. is a phrase that I learned from the cycling community 🚴‍♀️ #cyclomania. It means riding a horse or bicycle and looking good while doing it. Often, I wear bright colors while riding or running for safety purposes. If you're seen, so much the better, because it lowers the risk of getting into a collision. And a close family member of mine was killed while running because she was hit by a minivan. But sometimes, like this week, I enjoy dressing up just for the fun of it. I find inspiration in the stories I grew up listening to. I wanted to represent Belle today, who didn't start out as a princess, but through her kindness, she came to love the Beast. I identified with Belle because she loved books and was a gorgeous brunette, like me. And, like her, I fell in love with a man who had a great bookshelf. 📚 # Bibliophile: I get to refresh my memory on Disney princesses, villains, and heroines by telling bedtime stories to my son as he falls asleep. He doesn't consciously remember every story, but I know he hears me. He puts princess figurines all around our bedroom for protection. Loving the energy from @fit4mom_west_sfv this morning. Showing up and being surrounded by kindness, moms supporting other moms, makes the journey of motherhood so much better. #communityinmotherhood #raisekindhumans #momssupportmoms #ourvillage #motherhoodsisterhood #worldprincessweek

GRACE. If you are newly postpartum or raising small children, you've got to give yourself grace. It's going to take time to get your energy back. Motherhood has been a powerful motivator for me. I want to be able to keep up with my son, so I keep pushing myself to stay strong and ready. Initially, when I thought of grace, I thought of Mulan. I'm not sure Princess is part of her back story, but she was a strong influence in my childhood. I was a tomboy. I ended up in a male-dominated career field. I've always tried to keep up with men and fit in among them. To be just as smart, fast, and strong. Mulan did what she did to protect her father and bring honor to her family. She was an epic failure at being a #tradwife but an epic success at leading an army. She exceeded her family's expectations and ended up with an even better match than any matchmaker would have found for her. Mulan reminds us to gracefully pursue our destiny, even if it doesn't fit with society's expectations for us. I thought about the graceful movements of a swords(wo)man. I realize that the modern military is different than the fighting style depicted in Mulan. I feel grateful for our military service men and women. Thanks to our veterans and first responders as well. ⚔️ Finally, I thought about how some workouts are tough. You have to give yourself the grace to suck sometimes. The law of averages will balance it out eventually with a workout that kicks ass in a good way. Today I felt so strong, graceful, and fast. ⚖️ Keep showing up. #ownthecrown #stronglooksdifferent

BRAVE. The brave thing I did today was bring my kid to work. His school has a holiday but my school did not. Today's theme got me thinking about various times in my life where I took a leap of faith. One of the biggest leaps I took was when I moved to California. I knew the cost of living was going to be really high. But I also knew that ultimately it was where I wanted to be. I wasn't sure how it was going to work out, but I was brave enough to go for it with the faith that I would figure it out. The second biggest leap of faith that I took was going through IVF. It was so expensive with no guarantees. It was like going through puberty again at 39 years old. I had to confront some of my biggest fears and misconceptions about becoming a mother. Thankfully for us, it only took one round. I'm so grateful that I was brave enough to take these leaps of faith. Finishing my PhD at UC Riverside was such a significant moment in my life. Training for and completing the LA Marathon (while wearing my Changed Fate set) was no big deal after becoming a doctor and then becoming a mother. If you're thinking about chasing a big goal or taking a leap of faith in the direction of your dreams, consider this a gentle push in that direction. Be brave.

STROLLER MILES. On my way to inspire the next generation of chemistry and biochemistry graduate students with my stroller and kindergartner, I dictated a lot of these microblogs while walking to and from school. Thanks to my bestie, Mykel for reminding me that it's okay to parent in public and that allowing students to see the joys and challenges of having children is a good thing. It's essential to make the work-life balancing act more visible. And this is also a post of appreciation for @bobgearus. I brought all the necessary items for my child and myself, as well as the supplies for my students. We had a fun day on campus. I love this stroller so much. I'll forever remember this as the vehicle that made all of our Disneyland dreams come true. BOB is an acronym for Beast of Burden, which is also a great song by the Rolling Stones. My Changed Fate set gives me powerful mama bear vibes when I need to remember how being a mom is my superpower. I also love how Merida was the shot caller in her story. She repairs the strained relationship with her mother and learns how to be more selfless. Even though Fit4Mom now pairs with Thule as their official stroller, I will never forget the BOB as my favorite part of strolling with my mini-me. My stroller model is BOB Revolution CE = City Edition which weighs ONLY 23 lbs.

I tried my darndest to get through August without overdosing on ibuprofen. However, on August 31st, I finally took some ibuprofen, which relieved the pain in my feet. It was an increase in miles, too much, too soon. I forgot how school drop-off adds extra mileage to the week. But as I say, we're trying to ease into the school year, and it's okay if there are some growing pains. Albert asked me to make him a social battery indicator so that he can have time to recharge without us bothering him too much. He's always had a high emotional intelligence, and this just shows that he can ask for a way to communicate with us.

   

Another thing Albert did recently was create two paintings contrasting a poor person's house, which was small, only one story high, and made of reclaimed materials. Versus a rich person's home, which he called the Eiffel Tower, which was multilevel, taller than trees, and made of gold. And for some reason, the poor person is during the day, and the rich person is painted at night, surrounded by stars. This is likely due to my lighter teaching load, which results in less income, and we often discuss this. We tell Albert that we can't afford some things because mommy won't be bringing home as much money. We discuss how we'll need to acquire more items on Buy Nothing, as we can't purchase them. September was a "normal" paycheck, but it will probably be the last "big" one for the next 6 months.

I saw the hashtag #RecessionCore and others, such as #economytok or #costofliving, to express a theme of economic hardship and austerity. We're not the only ones affected by this change in lifestyle. #budgetfriendly #economicanxiety #savingmoney #thrift #tariffs I've never been overly concerned with being trendy, and I know I'm talking about budget here, but here are some things I did buy this summer (or last summer) that I (still) love. 

• ENERBLOOM Women's Yoga Jumpsuits Workout One Piece Rompers with Pockets Bodycon Backless Bodysuits Padded Berry Red X-Large. I wore this on a run, and someone told me I was a whole vibe. I had a SheFit bra underneath and my sequin headband. $19.99 I also wore it to the pool as a swimsuit. I don't know why they don't make more swimsuits like this.
• Neely Gracey, the mom and running coach, recommended this product as the most comfortable item for summer, and I wholeheartedly agree. I bought one of each color and walked out paying around $50. I like them a lot. I'm glad I bought them when I did. This athletic all-in-one dress trend reached Crowned Athletics, and they sold each one for $118. I know, girl math, but I feel like I saved over $300. https://www.costco.com/elle-sport-women's-active-tank-dress.product.4000293912.html
• WEBGGER 12 Pack Sequin Headbands Elastic Stretch Sparkly Fashion Headband for Teens Girls Women Hairband Sport Head Band Party Favors Multicolored now $5.94, usually $9.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09Z2TH288 Honestly, these are the best for summer. The airflow through the sequins is peak performance, and the sparklyness and color choices in this variety pack make my heart happy. I didn't bring one on my trip to Nebraska this year, but thankfully, I had left one the previous summer, and it was still there for me to use while I was visiting. Honestly, lifesaver. Somehow, the sequins are a great way to keep baby hairs from straying. I can't stand when my hair tickles my neck.
• IDALOP 20 Pairs Cute & Colorful Striped Quarter Crew Women's Colored Socks, Size 9-11 $19.99 So I'm midlife. I have mostly ankle socks. But I noticed when I wear a short skirt, it looks like SO MUCH LEG all the way down to the ankle. People nowadays say that ankle socks are out. So I got these crew socks. I wouldn't care fashion-wise but I do teach college-age students and I don't want to appear too out of touch.

I also found three pairs of jeggings at ALDI this week. Light blue, dark blue, and light grey. I have some Levi's jeggings that I purchased in the Spring 2023 semester for $27 each. They're finally starting to show daylight in the inner-thigh area after 5 semesters (2.5 years). So these ALDI ones are about half the price. I can't comment yet to their durability since I haven't even washed them yet, but I will use them to teach in for several years probably. I tried on XL and L and the large I couldn't even button / zip. There was a gap in the back of the XL but I guess I can wear a belt. https://www.aldi.us/product/serra-ladies-premium-light-blue-jeggings-m-0000000000072022 $12.99

My aunt noticed my Instagram is looking more colorful these days. I appreciate all the people who inspire me to keep being expressive. I'm glad summer is over, but is it really? We just had our AC fixed today, thank goodness. I know we're in for a few more months of heat. Sometimes it's in triple digits even through the end of October. Albert and I decorated the house yesterday for fall. He was insisting that it be fall but not spooky. Which means leaves and pumpkins, but not haunted houses and jack-o-lanterns.

Albert is dedicated to being a ghost for Halloween, and I've got 3 costumes already, so that the whole family can participate. I'm not sure we're doing the Boo at the Zoo or the Enchanted Halloweekends at the Discovery Cube. We've let all our memberships go. So we need to find a trick-or-treat thing we can do for free. I'm trying my best not to buy the Bath & Body Works Disney Villains collection. I know it will sell out quickly, but do I really need more lotion and hand soap?

It's the weekend of the Santa Monica Classic and the Disneyland Halloween Half-marathon. I'll be sitting these races out and preparing for the Bimbo Global 10k on September 28th. I haven't done that one before, but registration was free, and it's closer to our house. I received a free sample of Ever&Eden Premium Mineral Sunscreen Lotion SPF 50, but I'm not impressed with it so far. These are more of my favorites that I buy again and again and use daily.

• Sun Bum Baby Bum Mineral SPF 50 Sunscreen Stick - Hawaii 104 Act Compliant (Without Octinoxate & Oxybenzone) - UVA/UVB Face and Body Protection - Unscented for Sensitive Skin - Travel Size 0.45 Oz $12.50
• Eucerin Sun Sensitive Mineral Baby Sunscreen Lotion SPF 50 with Zinc Oxide Protection, Hypoallergenic Mineral Sunscreen for Babies, Tear Free and Fragrance Free, 4 Fl Oz Tube $20
• Banana Boat Kids MAX Protect & Play Sunscreen Spray SPF 100, 6oz | Clear Spray Sunscreen, Kids Sunscreen Spray, Kids Sunblock Spray, Kids Spray Sunscreen, Kids Sunscreen SPF 100, 6oz $14
• Neutrogena Pure & Free Baby Mineral Sunscreen Lotion with Broad Spectrum SPF 50 & Zinc Oxide, Water-Resistant, Hypoallergenic & Tear-Free Baby Sunscreen, 3 fl. oz, 3 pk $37
• https://thinksun.com/products/think-everyday-face-sunscreen-2oz-naturally-tinted  $16.50

In my efforts to save money, I also cleaned out my cabinets and put all my backstock of personal care products in rotation. Our good friend used to work at Paul Mitchell and would always gift us products whenever we visited him. So I have some shampoos, conditioners, and gels that will be on our bathroom shelves until they're gone. I lived so frugally when I started this blog, while in grad school. I know how to do it, I just wish I didn't have to.

Finally, I realized we're only six weeks away from the Mission Inn Run. I'm totally looking forward to that. I haven't thought about my outfits for race day. But I have time to come up with something. 

Summer bucket list

It's that time of year when the countdown to Back-to-School begins. We have just three weeks until Albert goes back to school (Kindergarten!). So I made a list of things that we might do. Some of these are things I had planned in advance, some of these we may not get to at this time but we'll come back to it later when we have more money and time.

beach
Zoo
Discovery Cube
San Fran
Central Library
Water slides
Playdates
Getty museum
Botanical garden
Dodger game
Drive-in movie
San Diego
Santa Barbara 

Shampoo rugs
Declutter tv stand in Queen suite
Declutter closet in Queen suite

Declutter close in King suite  
Declutter kitchen corner cabinet

Buy new fitted sheets for King and Queen

Make a visual race calendar for the family

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priorities

Yep it's cycle day 20. Luteal misery. I fell on my run this morning and cut my knee and the palms of my hands. It got me thinking about my priorities. Should I have cut back the volume of today's run considering I'm a bit sick and on a difficult part of my cycle? Should I have done a shorter workout since my husband and I overslept? Was I rushing to get home and therefore not watching my footing? Was I pushing my pace too hard? Is it too soon after the marathon to be doing speed work again?

Mom

Wife

Teacher

Athlete / Coach

Dog Mom

Friend / Sister

Human Being

Woman

Artist / Gardener

The identities listed above define my priorities. Scheduling my time and doing the most important thing first is a struggle. Minute-by-minute, day-by-day, week-by-week, etc. I do count down the weeks of the semester. I count my parenthood duties as foremost in my mind. I cannot skip these. If my child is sick with a fever, I must drop everything else and take care of him until he is well again.

I guess my wife's duties are to my household and my husband. We took vows to care for each other in sickness and in health. As we strive to reach a more optimized state of health, these duties look like creating shopping lists and meal plans, cleaning kitchens and bathrooms, vacuuming and wiping down common areas, cooking and transporting food, restocking important household supplies, organizing items at the house so they can be inventoried and located, purging items that are no longer used. This is a long list. I also spend many hours per week just putting stuff away, sorting trash from treasures, and resetting areas to be useable again.

Next set of duties that I cannot skip, but also are not my top priority, are the things that I get paid for. Teaching duties, lesson planning, grading, sending emails, posting announcements, following up with absent students, etc. Writing quizzes, making copies, drawing on the board, communicating with colleagues in person and online, reading emails, and scheduling things. I put these things lower on the priority list when I need to, and then higher again when things at home are settled. I work ahead when I feel healthy and balanced, but I fall behind when other higher priorities become urgent.

My duties as an athlete/coach are sometimes higher and sometimes lower, but lately, they have been pretty high. I've let my health take a back seat to parenting and work for half a decade, and now I want to put it higher so that I don't skip workouts and backslide into more significant obesity than I currently am. I spend time creating content for YouTube to educate myself and my runClub. I program and track my workouts using spreadsheets and mileage trackers on Canva. I compare the data on my Samsung Health app to Strava Athlete Intelligence to keep myself motivated and moving forward. As Coach Bennett of the Nike Running app says, You're your best coach. Talk to yourself kindly as you would want your coach to talk to you.

I have a new identity as a dog mom again, which means that I have to fit dog walks into my life. I need to do some dog training and grooming, and remember to add her food to the shopping list, refill her water dish, talk nicely to her, and watch for her under my feet when I'm carrying something large so I don't step on her. 

As a friend, this may look like hour-long phone calls to check in on the women in my life. Or it may look like sharing something funny or motivational on Instagram messages. It doesn't have to take up a lot of time when I'm busy, but it is a steady stream of back-and-forth to let those women know they are important, significant, loved, and cared for. It's similar to sisterhood. It's curating the village. This may be a separate post, but I'm leaning into paying for my village. I paid to join the run club. I paid to join the Sparkle Squad. But I get a lot out of it too.

How the "human being" tasks ended up so far down, I don't know. This is stuff like eating, sleeping and pooping. Stuff all humans do. Getting sick, getting well, breathing, digesting, the things we take for granted when it is going well. Maybe we should also put hydration in this category. Also shopping for stuff like supplements, vitamins, and tracking macros. I mean, this could also be a separate post. I've reconsidered the supplements I'm taking. After some bloodwork before my marathon, which I begrudgingly agreed to do, I briefly stopped taking all my supplements. But since then, I've started retaking most of the supplements I had paused. 

I guess I would put "woman" in here in a general way to say self-care. Beyond friendships. Stuff like pampering. Spa time. Being alone. Thinking your own thoughts. Blogging like I'm doing now. Doing something I enjoy. The other day I heard a podcast about Disney stuff and they mentioned that Bath and Body Works was doing a line of Disney Princess fragrances. I had to go to the mall and smell it for myself. I'm not sure why this resonates with me in the category of women, but I guess princesses are women and women are taught to be conscious of smelling good, not sweaty, and having soft skin, not rough. So this type of self-care is associated with femininity. It also falls under the Wife category since it involves keeping the lotions and soaps stocked. It is Woman, though, because this dry skin due to perimenopause is something else. And I'm hoping the lotions help with that.

Artist is the last, lowest, and least of my identities. But it's still there! This may be visual with crafting, or it may be kinesthetic with roller disco and dance. I had vowed that when I finished the marathon season, I would do something else in the off-season and get back into dance or rollerskating. And then I went ahead and signed up for another marathon! Yes, I'm doing the LA Marathon 2026. But I still have a lot of semester left to finish, and most of the summer will pass by before training starts again in earnest. Naughty Girl Fitness is $14.44 a month, and it's app-based. 

I'm still paying for my Fit4Mom instructor membership, which is $9.99 per month, not even covered by the amount I get paid for coaching the RunClub. After talking with my husband over the long weekend, we may have concluded that I might not continue coaching the RunClub. I might get more out of the season if I commit fully to LARR. The good discount with Fit4Mom is that you do not have to pay for the monthly membership as an instructor and you can still attend classes. I think I was paying $69 per month for Fit4Mom, and at one time, I was paying hundreds of dollars for a monthly membership and Body Well. 

People say good things about Orange Theory Fitness, and 24 Hour Fitness, but for now I've got my Planet Fitness Membership. It's $25 per month for the Black Card membership, which includes massage chairs, hydromassage, tanning and Total Body Enhancement, which I have yet to try but I might do it soon. It's vibration combined with red light therapy. Again, this could be a topic of a future blog post. What I'm looking forward to most is the end of the semester and our trip to Nebraska. What I'm not looking forward to is the Rose Bowl Half because it seems so out of place in the season, finishing up all the work of grading and submitting grades, and the weather going hotter and hotter as we approach summer. 

Maybe I could add to Artist also Gardener. And this is the lowest priority. At the moment completely dead. But it is generally in spring where I revive our garden. Albert has shown some interest in planting stuff for spring. It will be difficult to justify since we're traveling to Nebraska early in June, but maybe if I'm clear with my husband about care instructions, the garden won't be completely dead when we get back. And I really need to work on getting stuff OUT of our house. It's so overstuffed right now it's stressing me out.

I am a creator

I have been the creator of memories, travel extravaganzas, and home vibes. I took a style quiz and it categorized me as Cottagecore. I hadn't even known what that was until now, but now that I am aware of it, I can lean in.

We did a lot of rearranging of our upstairs. The King Suite has become the repository of old books, it has a cute seating area and a stretching and meditation area. Behind the curtains, in the bay window, there is a bunch of piles of stuff that I could organize better. It's all our grab-and-go Disneyland packing and travel items. Mixed in with some random blankets and home goods that I don't know what to do with. I did sell some things on the consignment sale, but I could be more aggressive in promoting and letting go of leftover things on Buy Nothing. Or organize the closet better to accommodate that stuff in our King Suite walk-in closet.

The Queen suite is now a bunkhouse. It has toys and books like a child's playroom. It has the LoveSac CitySac which is kind of too big for the space, but we aren't ready to get rid of it just yet. It has a fake tree that doesn't even look remotely real, but it was free, and good ones are like $80. I love the bunk beds. I love the two bedside storage units I got on the last consignment sale. They hold my phone, water, and tissues. I'm starting to leave kiddo alone in the Queen bed and sleeping alone on the bunk bed. It's nice to have the option on these hot summer nights.

I had the bathroom set up like a Disney hotel for my sister's visit in May, but we made all the big changes after she left. We had a mini-Minnie fridge and Mickey single-cup coffee maker in there. I got a new shelf to use more vertical space and bring a spa-quality. I love it. Also, I found a pretty sweet TV stand on the curb, which adds a spot for the TV and some storage for clothes and art supplies. I have the easel in the closet at the moment. But we had such a good time painting, I know I'll be getting that stuff out again at some point. I just got a few new canvases, well they have paintings on them now, but I plan to Gesso and repurpose them.

I finally put up some things in the downstairs bathroom that I've been wanting to do since we moved in here over 6 years ago. My lipstick rack! And a prayer mat that is very decorative with flowers, etc. Leaning into the cottage-core, I know that botanical prints are my style, and maximalist decorating is okay with me. I used some sticky-back Velcro to mount the carpet to the wall. It was a quick fix inspired by all the child-proofing we did. It's fun to see some or all of the childproofing stuff coming down now that the kiddo is nearly 3.5 years old.

Making memories with travel and travel fantasy has been the vibe of July. Since our magic key is blocked out for the summer, I planned some ways to travel to Disneyland virtually, inspired by so many folks who did so during the pandemic closures. I made a cookbook of my favorite foods. I made a playlist of music that you would hear at the park. I bought some aromatherapy oils that are Disney-themed. Bought a Mickey balloon at Dollar Tree. I dress us in our parkwear even when we aren't going out. These are some of the ways we have created staycations that are fun, family-oriented, and not free. Definitely not free. But at least we don't have to endure this brutal 100-degree heat.

It has taken me a long time to source the raw materials for the Disneyland recipes. Which kind of makes me appreciate and yearn for the parks even more. The recipes are quite involved with lots of exotic ingredients and take lots of time and energy to make. When you think of it that way, the park prices don't seem so steep. I thought I would want to cook a lot when we got back from Nebraska, but it's been so hot, I don't want to turn on the oven.

Here is our Nebraska Trip Packing list:

Carryon

1) Umbrella stroller

2) Tula & ring sling

3) Albert's headphones

4) Kelly backpack

5) crackers

6) oreos

7) m&ms

8) cherrios

9) flour sack towel 

10) diapers

11) wipes

12) clothes for Albert

13) toys (separate list below)

14) power bank + cable

15) CARES harness

16) small Mickey backpack

17) Cotopaxi backpack

Mom & Dad

1) underwear (8)

2) socks (7)

3) walking shoes (wear it)

4) flip flops

5) yoga pants (1)

6) shorts (5)

7) sweat pants / jeans (1)

8) tops (7) 

9) sports bras (2)

10) toiletry bag w/ nail clippers, shampoo / conditioner, body wash, hire gel, toothpaste / toothbrush

11) headphones 

12) swimsuits

13) hats

14) Tylenol/vitamins 

15) long-sleeved shirt (1)

16) cable for versa 3

17) Goodr sunglasses

18) garment bag for washing

19) large wetbag for laundry

20) small wetbag for swimming

Albie

1) short outfits (7) 

2) long pants (2)

3) pjs (7)

4) socks (7)

5) shoes (wear it)

6) hat

7) swimsuit

8) swim diapers (4)

9) mud boots

10) cousin crew shirt

Wish I had brought

1) Q-tips

Honestly, we had enough of everything. We did laundry 3 times, about every 4th day. We brought a ton of stuff to occupy the kiddo on the plane but ended up using it on the trip so it was worth bringing but could've been in a checked bag.

Alphabet Water Coloring Cards
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BR37XL5R 

Vehicle Foam Magnets for Toddlers

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07FYC12GX 

Disney Pixar Cars/Planes Ultimate Sticker Activity Pad
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00BMMNSL8 

MagnetiBook Racers Vehicle Game
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07BB7PXQT 

Splash Of Color- Magnetic Sorting Set

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B007DYUAKQ 

PlayTape Road Tape for Toy Cars
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00GZ8UE2K

Amazon Basics Reusable Silicone Round Baking Cups, Muffin Liners, Pack of 12, Multicolor
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01KWTGAVQ

POP! Tinsel Pom Bright Assorted 100ct 

https://www.joann.com/pop-tinsel-pom-bright-assorted-100ct/18263004.html

Disney/Pixar Cars 3 My Busy Book -10 Figurines and a Playmat
https://a.co/d/3ZyZcXt

Honestly, everything on this list was a hit except the sticker pad. I know we will use the stickers at some point so it's not a big deal. One funny thing that happened is that I had a battery pack in my carry-on and also the magnetic book. The airport scanners read it as an undeclared tablet and gave us a hard time about it. So just be aware of that, if you're flying with the magnetic book and a power bank, best to take them out and explain what they are to TSA. Another thing that I forgot is that if you have programs downloaded to your tablet on Apps like Amazon Prime Video, Disney+, Paramount+, or Netflix, they will say expired or something when you are in airplane mode. Then when we were able to connect to the wifi, it worked again. Honestly, what is the point of traveling with a tablet if it doesn't play the downloaded content on the flight? We did use it in the airport during our 2-hour layover so it did have some use, but not as much as I thought. More useful was the phone connected to Southwest free onboard wifi and watching a free movie. We watched "The Croods: A New Age." I was surprised to hear the flight crew announce that all passengers using mobile entertainment MUST wear headphones. We had some but I just don't recall a specific announcement before. We brought a monkey leash, harness, and stuffie, but it wasn't as useful as in prior years. He threw a tantrum in the carrier and on the leash. Actually, the umbrella stroller was a godsend and totally saved our asses. We lost our 2nd cupholder by gate-checking it, but it was super helpful and worth it.

Universal Stroller Sun Cover UV Protection Baby Stroller Sun Shade Buggy Pram Sun Rain Shade Blackout Blind Canopy blue https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09VXJJC65 

This cover has been amazing and has taken the umbrella stroller from a novelty to an actually useful and functional piece of equipment. The stroller we have now is this one. I think I bought it for $15 or something like that. It's been great. We even got kiddo to take a nap in it. The only thing it's missing is a snack tray but that would take away from its collapsability. We used to have two cupholders, then only 1, and now none.

Summer 3Dlite Convenience Stroller, Black – Lightweight Stroller with Aluminum Frame, Large Seat Area, Mesh Siding, 4 Position Recline, Extra Large Storage Basket – Infant Stroller for Travel https://a.co/d/01npwmd

We ended up needing an extra suitcase on the way back because we bought some Hot Wheels tracks and my parents gave me some Little Golden Books from my childhood. It was a long trip. It was a great trip. It was painful revisiting childhood trauma and even worse bringing my husband and son into it. It was refreshing to have my adult self and my husband's adult self validating that it was traumatic and there's a reason I now live 2000 miles away. Although it was sad to see how close my parents are with their other grandchildren, I see that it might not be healthy for me to live closer. My mom and I get along so well over the phone, but in person, we're like gas and a lighted match. Not sure who is who in that analogy, but let's just call it volatile and unstable.

Got my new teaching schedule and feeling a bit of back-to-school manic energy. Bought a new lab coat. Letting my hair grow out. Took kiddo to our pool in his puddle jumper and he had a blast. He picked out this set of bath toys at World of Disney in May and then had a meltdown that the wheels didn't spin. Fast forward two months and he is loving them as pool toys.

https://www.shopdisney.com/cars-bath-set-461075339233.html

Wow, this is turning out to be a long post. I'm not even able to convey all the stuff I bought for myself during my birthday month. Let’s just say that I celebrated myself by getting some new Latched Mama rompers, t-shirts, PJs, and jewelry. I have a couple of items I haven't worn yet. One I did wear and kiddo told me I looked pretty which was definitely one of those Grinch moments where my heart swelled to 10x its usual size. This was on my way to the book club. I'm enjoying getting back into reading and logged a few books for the library reading challenge. I'm doing a big deep cleaning here at home, partly because we need it, and partly because I agreed to host the next book club. I got a few pairs of Goodr sunglasses, which I love. I know I said I would put a pause on buying breastfeeding clothing but I just can't. I'm still doing it so often, it seems right to keep going.

How does it feel to be 43 years old? I'll leave you with a few realizations I had while doing yoga this past weekend at Malibu Wines... Thank you for making me a woman. Thank you for allowing me to carry and breastfeed a child. Thank you for making me a teacher. I love my students. I love being a woman. Honestly. I have never felt such a deep and profound gratitude for my body and for my womanhood. And for my hormones. And for not giving up my profession. I do love having summers off to spend in creativity and in love with my son. World Breastfeeding Week is just around the corner: Tue, Aug 1– Mon, Aug 7. The theme is "Enabling Breastfeeding: Making a Difference for Working Parents.”

summertime

The longest days of the year are here. We are weeks away from the solstice and I feel my energy peaking. Tomorrow is the full strawberry moon. 

I have enjoyed filling my time with visiting friends and family. Even though I said I would never volunteer at another consignment sale, I am working tomorrow at Burbank and then skating at Moonlight Rollerway.

Kiddo is becoming a more independent sleeper. It's noticeable. Sometimes he nurses like crazy, sometimes he's just too busy. We put up bunk beds in the house and they're fun but now we have an excess of furniture and we need to downsize again.

I actually got out my sewing machine today. 

Beauty Regimen for a Toddler Mom

Throughout adulthood, I've gone through many revisions to my beauty regimen. There are factors such as priority (how much do you need to care about your appearance), cost (how much money do you want to spend on products), and time (how much time do you have in the day to devote to grooming). Definitely there is an absolute minimum of things you should do for yourself and it's debatable where that minimum lies. I'm definitely trying to get on board with once or twice daily face washing, daily sunscreen, and I've gotten into the Curly Girl Method for hair care.

With all the other things one has to shop for and maintain an inventory list of (groceries, diapers, clothing, gas, etc) sometimes beauty goes to the bottom of my priority list. It's expensive and tempting to cut corners. But I have a skin condition (rosacea) that is itchy and painful if not managed. I also tend to get an itchy flaky scalp if I neglect my haircare. I live in a city that has pretty bad air quality and low humidity and lots of sun, so if I don't take care of these things, they go to shit pretty fast.

I've written detailed descriptions of what worked for me at earlier stages of life. In 2011 I was teaching at the Claremont Colleges, which meant that appearance was a high priority and I had lots of money. During pregnancy, my priority was eliminating any carcinogens that might pass to the developing fetus. The newly postpartum time was hellish. I wasn't sleeping and I was focusing so much on caring for a newborn. But finally now I think I can report on what is working for me as a mom.

Pre-Pregnancy
http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2011/10/formula.html

Pregnancy
http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2019/12/pregnancy-part-18.html

Newly Postpartum
https://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/05/postpartum-part-10-beauty.html 

These three products together are a good haircare brand. I use the mask whenever it starts looking very dry like straw. I can find the first two at Target but  I had to order the mask on Amazon. I really thought I would use "dry shampoo" and I spent a lot of time researching it, but I never really got into it.

DevaCurl Low Poo is good between shampoos. I shampoo weekly and do a deep cleanse (Suave) once per month, according to the Curly Girl Method. In between washes, I refresh with the low-poo. Once I've washed and set the hair with the gel (below), I don't touch it. I don't brush it. I plop it onto a long-sleeved shirt and wrap it up for 15 minutes, then take it down and put in some butterfly clips to give it volume in the front. Then I take the clips out when it's dry and "scrunch out the crunch" and don't touch it after that.

I cleaned up my drawer at work and this is what all I found. I got the Surf Spray and DevaFresh spray to refresh my curls between washes. Now I had very long pandemic hair when I bought those and now I have a kind of long bob so I don't really use them now. Also I don't like the strong aroma of the DevaFresh but it does do a good job of making the curls look good again.

The think Everyday Face tinted sunscreen SPF 30 is something I can't live without anymore. I also love the think magnesium deodorant charcoal & sage is also SO GREAT. CT Organics Shea Butter Coconut Lotion is a must-have for dry skin. As well as lanolin, which is great for cracked dry skin. There are some things that I bought as a nursing mom that I still use and lanolin is one of them. I love the CT Organics natural deodorant and the company is owned by a mompreneur so I love supporting her. Degree is the antiperspirant and Tom's is another "natural" deodorant, which both have an expiration date of 2018 LOL which is definitely 5 years ago. So I'm gonna throw them away now.

Clinique redness solutions was brought to my attention when we were planning our wedding, if I'm not mistaken and I've been a loyal customer since then. But I have found that Johnson's Head-To-Toe Baby Wash and Shampoo is a good mild facial cleanser that I use from time to time. Clinique dramatically different moisturizing lotion + is my favorite and go-to daily lotion for the face. I did also purchase Facial Cleansing Wipes for sensitive skin from Target. I use Pond's Cold Cream first and remove it with the cleansing wipe. Then add moisture from the Clinique lotion. That seems to give me a refresh without having to put my face over the sink and splash water everywhere like some silly Neutrogena commercial. I don't have time for that. Plus our counters are really high here at work and I can't lean over the sink without using a footstool.

Likewise, just as I use the baby shampoo as a cleanser, I also borrow my kid's sunscreen. This one is the absolute best. If I don't care about looking like a washed-out ghost that is. And also I have to remember to take this mineral sunscreen off. If I don't, it really clogs my pores. Speaking of clogged pores, I have this All About Clean 2-in-1 Charcoal Mask + Scrub. I use it as a mask and it does wonders. I also have the Pacifica brand curl refreshing spray, which I leave at home. I like the smell much better, it's nice without being overpowering, and it does an okay job of making my curls look better. Some of these sprays claim to be a scalp refresh so it's possible I'm just not using it correctly, but it does give a cooling sensation if you spray near the scalp and massage it in a bit to your roots.

I bought the Pond's Dry Skin Cream on accident. I thought it was a cleanser but it's only a moisturizer. So now I use the stack here. Cleanse with the cold cream, wipe it off with a washcloth and then moisturize (slug) with the dry skin cream. I wear this after a day out, so it's more of a weekend or nighttime ritual. And you can see that I'm never far from a batch of CT Organics moisturizing lotion. It's great for a foot massage, a leg massage, a hand cream, rough elbows, you name it. I don't put it on my face though.

After I became a mom, this lotion is really the only thing I wanted to put on my face. It's hella expensive but it really soothes angry skin. And if you have angry skin, you know what I'm talking about. If you don't have angry skin, I'm happy for you. Skip this. But if you have been out in the sun for 8 hours and the wind has been blowing and your skin is angry, this cream will really help you out. You will wake up the following morning and look like you just had the best night of sleep ever. I don't know how it works but it allows my skin to repair itself and stop being angry. I don't use it every day because of the price, but when I need it, I go for it.

This brand, Jurlique, came into my life from Buy Nothing. A friend gave me a slide. I didn't want it so I gave it to another mom who wouldn't take it without giving me something in return. I said it wasn't necessary but she said that her mother (or MIL) kept pushing her to take better care of her skin and she is a twin mom so she's twice as busy as me. I wasn't so sure that this would be something helpful for me, but it is a cleansing oil which smells fantastic and botanical. Again, I like that it is something that can be used without splashing a bunch of water all around. I apply 3 pumps of it to my fingertips and then rub it all over my face. I feel like it removes salt and pollution (grit) very well and gets trapped stuff out of my pores. Then I wet a washcloth and use that to take off the cleanser. After that, I apply the cream. It's very thick and also smells like a garden. I sometimes feel like the day after using these two, my skin is a bit redder than usual but I also feel like it's better than NOT washing my face at all. Like given the choice between using this or doing nothing, using this is way better.

Honestly, I would love for a dermatologist to hand me the quick fix for my rosacea but from what I've read, there are many forms and causes and very few actual "magic bullet" treatments that work for everyone. This is where I'm at now and I do use the tinted sunscreen to cover the redness and that makes me feel a bit less insecure. If I'm very good about wearing sunscreen, it tends to not flare up as much. But sometimes I think the tinted sunscreen actually causes the flare-ups. Something in the solvent or the fragrance. It's lightly scented like in a tropical way. I am interested in trying a product with azelaic acid or metronidazole, if one were available OTC. I heard Paula's Choice is good.

New Semester, New Wardrobe

I had started making purchases for this semester before it started, so here's a list of what I bought in order of how much I love it and how much it has helped me.

Kelly Bag with matching Pumparoo $39 = new $160. This is a game-changer. I would say if you're thinking about getting a pumping bag but you don't know how long you'll be pumping, this one is awesome even for just going to work. The pump compartment is a cooler so I can put my lunch in there and not have to take a separate bag. Then when I get to work, I flatten that compartment and put all my work stuff in there and it all fits. Then at the end of the day, I put all my dirty dishes in the main compartment and it all fits. Amazing! If I were to change the design at all, I would love to have a chest clip and some reflective details, but I'll work on adding that stuff myself.

Simple Joys by Carter's Baby Everyday Diaper Backpack, I got this off Buy Nothing for Free = $50 new. This is my new fav diaper bag. I love how it clips on to the stroller. I love the wipes pocket on the side. It's a great park bag.

Signature by Levi Strauss & Co. Gold Label Women's Size Totally Shaping Pull-On Skinny Jeans
Levi's $111 for 4 pairs (size 20) definitely follow the size chart, do not go by what size Amazon recommends for you! I had to send the first pair back for a refund. So far I haven't put them in the dryer but husband did and it didn't seem to ruin it. The waistband wasn't exactly right, but it got into place once I put them on. I can't speak to durability at this point since it's only week 2 but I can say that I don't dread getting dressed in the morning. I throw on one of these and go.

Latched Mama Snuggle Up Nursing Sweatshirt 2x/3x $58. I am using this WAY more than I thought I would. I absolutely love it and so does Albert. I can put him in there either forward or rear facing. It's been colder than usual with some days in the 30s and I can wear him to school so he stays nice and warm and cozy and I don't have to worry about him freezing in the stroller.

I never regret anything I buy from Latched Mama. I'm already using the vest daily and I love it. I did get some holiday-specific stuff which I packed away until next year. I do feel like a crazy person for it, but also I get so many compliments on the snuggle-up.

I can't believe I almost forgot to write about these new shoes. I love them so much. I realized after a bit of shopping that it's better to know the number of this year's (latest) model and then shop specifically for last year's. That's how I found the Ghost 14 for the cheapest. The other two are "this year" models, but I couldn't find the previous year models in my size. They were sold out.

One of my colleagues asked me, "where are your crazy pants?" I guess I was becoming notorious for the LuLaRoe pants with wild prints. I don't mind, of course.

My workout pants that I love are
CRZ YOGA Women's Naked Feeling High Waisted Yoga Pants with Pockets Workout Leggings Camo - 25 Inches Camo Multi 16 25'' X-Large

They also make shorts
CRZ YOGA Women's Naked Feeling Long Biker Shorts - 10'' High Waist Workout Yoga Gym Running Spandex Shorts Side Pockets Stone-Washed Indigo X-Large

I have both 10" inseam and 8" inseam. I kind of like the shorter ones because they let my knees cool down. But both are great! People in my life keep complaining about their yoga pants and I can't say enough good things about these. I've had the pants for 2 years and I wash and dry them with all my other laundry (no special treatment) and they are so durable.

November 2021 thoughts

 11/1 - Putting LO in daycare tomorrow for the first time. Pray for us.

11/2 - Daycare drop-off on LO's 1st ever time away from parents went well. I left him at 8am and picked him back up at noon. I cried and have a migraine from the stress. The daycare said LO did great. Phew. What a relief.

I hope they don't think we are total weirdos for starting with half days, but I'm just not ready to let LO try to nap somewhere else. I want to do some short days so that LO becomes confident we'll come back to get him. He's good with routines, so I'm gonna try a few weeks of synchronization of his routine at home with the routine at daycare.

11/3 -  I am starting to let go. The last thing I want is to stifle my LO's development by keeping him too close to me. We took our baby set off the Tripp Trapp, which means no straps. We've had several falls with him climbing all over it. But I still haven't put the straps back on because I think he's just exploring it and he'll learn how to get up and down with practice. So if you're ready for all that, go ahead and go booster seat.

Has anyone coined a term for the work-from-home-no-childcare mom (or parent) yet? I did finally send my LO to daycare, and it has been so hard for me to adjust. The house is so quiet. I have my autonomy back. I have my brain back. I can shower alone. But I feel like half my body is gone. I somehow miss the constant demands for attention. I can't stop talking to myself. I don't know if I should be making an OB appointment to get on some kind of antidepressant or antipsychotic medication. I know it will continue to evolve, and we're just doing half-days at daycare, but right now my heart is full of big feelings.

11/7 - I spent about an hour on the foam roller last night and I woke up this morning with no pain in my back, neck, legs and feet. It was glorious. Spent the better part of the day cleaning out the garage. Hubs always wants to have a quiet relaxing weekend. I always want his help doing things I can't do (or don't want to do) alone. This caused some tension but I'm happy because I got (and did) what I wanted. We had great weather for garage work (cool breeze, overcast). LO had fun running around inside the garage and playing with a bunch of new treasures. I was able to part with some items from the past and I aim to go further with decluttering and letting go.

BR: we let some big toys and a stroller go. I have to say this is why I needed my husband's help. I can get sentimentally attached to objects and hang on to them for way longer than necessary. I'm considering getting rid of my cloth diaper stash. Now that LO is in daycare, I don't see us going back to that.

11/8 - Our dog is 14. LO plays & spills the dog food & water multiple times per day. We've explored rehoming the dog but with no strong leads. Now that LO is at daycare, I'm hoping the dog enjoys having the house to herself for at least half days.

11/10 - The strength of my marriage is not tested when all is well and easy. It is testable when things are not good, when we're tired. Thanks parenthood for providing ample opportunity for testing.

11/11 - Is there any regret for NOT having formal photos of LO? I bought a tiny suit in size 18m but never sat LO down all dressed up for a photo. Daycare arranged picture day last week but it was on a Friday and our kiddo only goes Tues, Wed, Thurs. I didn't do a formal Halloween pic. I'm wondering if I will regret this.

It's still so weird with COVID having doubts about being in public. Do I take LO to the mall to sit on Santa's lap or is that creepy and weird? Do I take photos at the beach on some random day? Do I ditch the suit and just move on?

11/16 - I was talking with a colleague yesterday about being a working mom and I came up with an analogy: trying to come up with ideas from my mombrain is like wringing out a dirty dishrag. Let's say a good idea would be clean soapy (productive) water but all it seems I'm getting out of my brain now are dingy dirty gross (not valuable) ideas. Crap, basically. She was like, "it's unreasonable to expect yourself to work at the level you did before kids." And yes, I understand this. But I told her that I need to step down from all unpaid work. For my sanity and because I am not sharing valuable contributions and that stresses me out.

I also realized that by sending LO to daycare for just 12 hours per week, I feel like I got oxygen back into my lungs. Like it resuscitated me. I came back to life. I was drowning. And I feel born again. We're only in week 3. LO had diarrhea last Thursday (when daycare was closed for Veteran's Day) and vomited Thursday night, then been sniffling and whiny all throughout the long weekend so I didn't get as much work done as I had hoped. But LO is back to daycare today. Even though he still has a runny nose, they said I could leave him since he doesn't have a fever.

My printer inexplicably stopped printing and I am frustrated. WFH sucks because I can't call IT and have someone else deal with it and also I don't need it fixed badly enough to actually deal with it myself.

11/21 - We rehomed our dog this week. She has been gone since Wednesday. She went to a SAHM whose son is now in school and she was looking for a companion. Our 14 year old maltipoo is good with our son but was so spoiled that she was barking at us to take her for walks and we just couldn't deal with being barked at constantly. She also stole food out of LO's hand, causing mealtime meltdowns. Our LO was constantly dumping the dog's food and water on the laminate flooring that cannot get wet so that was a challenge. And LO was constantly going out the dog door and playing in the garden and bringing in dirt and rocks, so we would shut the dog door but then the dog would bark. So yeah I'm filing this under self-care. I have had a dog for the past 20 years so it's an adjustment, but LO is a handful so I'm plenty busy as a non-dog-owner.

11/24 - The walk to daycare this morning was eerily quiet. LO pretty much falls asleep immediately in the car, which is great if you plan for it but kinda sucky if you're driving 5 minutes and your LO wakes up permanently if you attempt a transfer.

My LO is firmly against hats. I'm sad because I love hats and have bought him a bunch of them that he refuses to wear.

11/29 - Milestone Monday = Jumping! He first did it when he was watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and they were all jumping. He's been doing it daily since. He does come to my exercise classes with me and has since I was 13 weeks pregnant. So he's seen me jump, squat, lunge and all that. He does baby squats and baby twerks also. I love seeing him have music appreciation.

11/30 - Hate that our daycare only has me listed. I get all notifications and fill out all forms. DH is listed but not authorized to login with his email so he does not receive notifications. I just hate coparenting when the mom is the default for everything. Dad should be equally responsible, notified, informed and authorized.

Also while I'm ranting, we are spending Thanksgiving and Xmas with in-laws. Trying to pin down whether there is a gift exchange. His family is so freaking formal. I just know they will want to have LO open presents and sit down for a meal. Then they get upset that he doesn't understand how to open presents or won't want to play with whatever they buy for him. They have not asked what we want so I hope it's not a plastic annoying monstrosity. Also LO won't make it through a formal dinner. And I will have to chase him around the whole time saying "Don't touch grandma's [insert breakable item on the toddler eye level]." They haven't watched LO even one time since he was born. Ugh.