what I didn't know I didn't know

1) cloth diapers

I didn't know my baby would prefer cotton over fleece. I didn't know I would never use the 16 bamboo cotton fitteds, 33 polyester pockets, 14 single gusset PUL covers or 7 polyester AIOs.

I love my Bummis Super Whisper Wrap PUL covers and my 27x2 FSTs. I double them now and still use a kite fold with a snappi closure. I have just recently added a set of 24 bamboo washcloths for extra absorbany in the baby boy pee zone. But I have 122 inserts that I am not using at all.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B088FFKH6X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_fabc_4NTPW2M8C33EXMCAD41Q?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1

I didn't know I would never use the wet bags outside of the house. I never knew the simplest trash can would be my favorite. I never knew I would use the diaper sprayer until my son was 9 months old but it is useful and I love it now.

2) mittens

I didn't realize how much babies scratch themselves. I thought I would not need hats and mittens but they were helpful while we were figuring out the scratching phase. I didn't know what to do for the baby's cradle cap but eventually I got a brush for it and that helped. I started hoarding pjs that had built-in hand covers.

3) footed vs non footed pjs

For a while I only wanted footed pjs. I didn't understand why footless pjs were even made. Then my baby started crawling and standing and now I get it. I only want footless pjs now.

It's funny how you think you know something. What you want, what you need. And then baby grows and gets new skills and everything changes. It's like every 2 months. I hate spending money to solve a problem for such a short time. But when it's a problem, it's an urgent and very real sometimes life-threatening problem. Sometimes it's a matter of comfort or less stress and that can seem like a lifesaver. And just when I thought we had reached living room babyproofing nirvana, it's time to reconfigure the space because baby is taller and exploring everything within reach.

postpartum care sucks

There I said it. Postpartum care sucks. It has taken me so long to regain my bodily functions. People told me it would take a year or longer but I was like, nah that can't be right. Why is it the doctor tells you at 6 weeks pp whether or not you are cleared for exercise. By the way due to COVID, I only emailed pictures of my scar and she replied back, "you're good." Is that the standard of care? I was never offered a mental health questionnaire. I didn't have a village. There was no LLL. No First 5 LA home visits. No Mommy & Me. No storytime. No Zoo. No botanical gardens. My maternity leave after baby was born was totally screwed. My sister is planning to visit for the first time when my baby is 14 months old. I mean I'm happy but I feel like new moms can use so much help. I needed it and it wasn't there. 

This post is being triggered by my participation in a Facebook group called Milky Fitness. A new mom (10 days pp) asked for suggestions of back exercises because she is suffering. I sent her a suggestion and the mods deleted my comment as an unsafe recommendation. Now, I know on paper you're not supposed to exercise until 6 weeks pp. But I started light exercise at 3 weeks pp. That's a fact. What is the point of timelines if nobody really checks you out? I know my body and what this new mom wanted is some help on a specific thing. Everyone else told her to just walk. For me, walking was really hard. A half-mile seemed like an impossible distance. So if someone had told me to just walk, I would have cried. But standing in my house, near my baby, and doing some arm raises... that for me was do-able. So screw those mods. Screw the healthcare industry. Screw COVID.

https://flic.kr/p/2kB3dUP

I did these for 12 weeks (5-7 months pp) and I did not do any crunches until 10 months. How does that fit with the "no workouts until 6 weeks" model? My chiropractor, who I saw 4 and 5 weeks after my son was born because I was having terrible back pain, recommended no crunches for a year pp. But I knew when I felt ready.

After reading this article

https://www.foxnews.com/health/exercise-after-baby-do-you-really-have-to-wait-6-weeks

I remembered something my OBGYN said at the 6 week follow up call. She said I could start running immediately. She didn't even ask about diastasis recti, or whether breastfeeding was contributing to joint pain. At that time, yes I had DR and I had serious pain in my wrists and feet. I am just now feeling like my feet are strong enough to shuffle. I still don't jump, hop or jog. WTF?