big guns

 

I finally had my appointment with a menopause-informed OB/GYN that I got a referral to from my primary doctor. 

He said Lo-Loestrin is great for managing perimenopause symptoms; that's what his wife took during that time.

He said the estrogen and progesterone dose in Lo-Loestrin is 4 times what you would get if you were prescribed HRT. So it's actually stronger.

He suggested I get an A1C measurement. I called my primary doctor to order that test for LabCorp. They'll email me the form.

He said he wants to see me again in 6 months for a check-up. So I guess that would be after the marathon.

He said it sounds like I'm doing everything right, and getting older just sucks.

He said not to worry about the heterogeneous uterus.

I went to Planet Fitness by myself and did the strength-training circuit my friend Erik showed me. I can see myself getting into a routine where I do that every week.

After one cycle of birth control pills, I did notice a significantly lighter period. During the placebo time, hot flashes and brain fog return. Irritability and itchy feet are back. And hair loss returns without estrogen supplementation. I noticed that after just 2 days on placebo.

I feel like my plantar fasciitis is actually getting better. I'm sleeping in hiking boots every night. I'm scraping my muscles before bed every night. I'm taking naproxen and ibuprofen in high doses both morning and night.

I also had time to make a new video for RunClub!

hormones

I have been holding this post back for a long time since it is so personal. And I get frustrated navigating the medical establishment. I was finally able to convince my doctor to order a hormone panel and here are the results that I got back. The blood was drawn on my cycle day 2.

Estradiol: Ranges from 30 to 400 pg/mL during reproductive years, but drops significantly to 0 to 30 pg/mL postmenopause.

Adult Female Range
Follicular phase 12.5 - 166.0
Ovulation phase 85.8 - 498.0
Luteal phase 43.8 - 211.0
Postmenopausal <6.0 - 54.7
Me = 16.2 pg/mL

Follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH): A normal premenopausal level falls between 5 and 21 mIU/mL. In postmenopause, the brain works harder to stimulate the ovaries, pushing levels to 25.8–134.8 mIU/mL.

Adult Female Range
Follicular phase 3.5 - 12.5
Ovulation phase 4.7 - 21.5
Luteal phase 1.7 - 7.7
Postmenopausal 25.8 - 134.8
Me = 7.3mIU/mL

Testosterone in women normally ranges between 15-70 nanograms per deciliter (ng/dL).

Premenopausal 10.0 - 55.0
Postmenopausal 7.0 - 40.0
Me = 18.4ng/dL

Luteinizing hormone (LH) During weeks one and two of the menstrual cycle, LH levels are normally between 1.37 to 9 IU/L. After menopause, levels of LH rise dramatically. The average range is 19.3 to 100.6

Adult Female Range
Follicular phase 2.4 - 12.6
Ovulation phase 14.0 - 95.6
Luteal phase 1.0 - 11.4
Postmenopausal 7.7 - 58.5 IU/L.
Me = 3.5mIU/mL

Thyroid-stimulating hormone (TSH) normally between 0.5 and 4.0 mIU/L.

Me = 0.949 uIU/mL

 
Progesterone below 1 ng/mL in the menstrual and follicular stage. Between 2 to 25 ng/mL in the luteal stage of the menstrual cycle. Postmenopausal below 0.2 ng/mL.

Follicular phase 0.1 - 0.9
Luteal phase 1.8 - 23.9
Ovulation phase 0.1 - 12.0
Postmenopausal 0.0 - 0.1
Me = 0.3 ng/mL

Prolactin
Normal 4.8-33.4 ng/mL
Me = 11.8 ng/mL


Calculating Hormonal Dominance - Progesterone to Estrogen | Testmottagningen
https://www.testmottagningen.se/en/kalkylatorer/progesteron-ostrogen-ratio/

Me = 18.52 P/E2

Progesterone levels should normally be between 200 to 400 times higher than estradiol.
A calculated result below 100 indicates possible estrogen dominance.
A calculated result above 500 indicates possible progesterone dominance.

Expect a postmenopausal progesterone-to-estrogen ratio of nearly zero without supplementation.

Perimenopause: During the transition years, ovulation becomes erratic, causing progesterone to plummet while estrogen levels can still spike. This leads to relative estrogen dominance, which triggers symptoms like weight gain, heavy periods, and breast tenderness

Target Ranges: For symptom relief, optimal target ranges are generally 50 pg/mL for estrogen and 10 ng/mL for progesterone, though these vary by individual need.

Given all this information, and using the Flo app, I determined that since I am still having periods every 13-38 days (roughly every 27 days) I am not yet a candidate for hormone replacement therapy (HRT). What I can do is take hormonal birth control to deliver a consistent dose of hormones to my body. For the last week, I've been taking Lo Loestrin Fe.

24 Blue Tablets: Active pills containing 1 mg norethindrone acetate and 10 mcg ethinyl estradiol. These molecules are a synthetic progestin and a synthetic estrogen, respectively.

Ethinyl estradiol binds to estrogen receptor alpha (ERα) and estrogen receptor beta (ERβ), which stops the secretion of gonadotropin-releasing hormone (GnRH), luteinizing hormone (LH), and follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH).

Norethindrone acetate binds to the nuclear progesterone receptor (PR), which prevents the endometrium from proliferating excessively, thickens the cervical mucus, and suppresses ovulation. Norethindrone acetate also inhibits the secretion of gonadotropins, specifically luteinizing hormone (LH) and follicle-stimulating hormone (FSH).

Taken together, these active pharmaceutical ingredients help in managing the symptoms of menopause by providing hormonal stability.



It does feel better to know that I'm not making these symptoms up. I really did have low estrogen and low progesterone. I've been taking the pill for a week now, and it does seem to be helping.

sane seen safe

This post started out as a Month of Mama recap and it definitely still is that.

4/30 MomsIRL

5/1 Chiro

5/2 NaughtyIRL

5/3 Bowling with Sally

5/4 eighth and final workshop

5/5 Albert dentist + New shoes

5/9 Dance your way to fitness

5/10 Mothers day Target run

5/13 Chiro + ultrasound

5/14 Watched Netflix on the couch + Dinner with Rashid

5/15 Chem Grad Party

5/16 Cobra 5Kai + Karin party

5/17 Salute to Recreation

5/20 submitted grades + Walmart run

5/21 donated blood

5/22 summer chop haircut

5/23 applied for EDD + D Line

5/24 IKEA scavenger hunt

5/25 Memorial day

5/26 eye doc

5/27 Dodge Bros walk + Skate

5/28 watched Netflix + LORs

5/29 kindergarten graduation

5/30 decluttering + Happy Ice

5/31 pool / recovery day

In summary, it was a good Month of Mama.

I titled it SANE, SEEN, SAFE because that's how Fit4Mom classes make me feel. Being in community with other moms helps me keep my sanity by lowering my expectations. I feel seen by the other moms who are all in the struggle. And it's amazing to be in a safe space with other women. MomsIRL, NaughtyIRL, and Moonlight Rollerway rainbow night are examples of safe spaces. I wish everywhere would feel safe for women.

Race Report: Los Angeles Marathon, March 8, 2026

The event itself: Where? How long? When? Weather?

The big factor in this year's race was the heat. I looked it up. It was a full fifteen degrees warmer at the starting line than last year. The race began at 7am, shortly followed by sunrise. I felt sweat dripping down my face by 8:30am. The humidity was 12%, so the water evaporated quickly.
They handed out ziploc bags of ice somewhere between miles 14-15. This totally saved my race. I put them directly in my sports bra. I also kept picking up discarded bags of ice off the ground or from the tops of trash cans, to keep packing it in. I didn't run out of ice until mile twenty-four, not coincidentally, when my core temperature started to overheat. Thank goodness they were handing out ice bags and cooling towels at the finish line.

Course description and evaluation of event logistics

As a result of all the misting, ice bags, and being sprayed by hoses and water guns, I ended up with significant chafing. I kinda felt it during the race, but I just kept going. One unusual factor of this year's race was that daylight savings began on race day. So everyone lost one hour of sleep in the annual spring forward. It was confusing for how to set the alarm clock. I went upstairs around 4 or 5pm and set a timer for 7.5 hours. I didn't want to set the alarm for some time like 2am, and have it get messed up from the time change.

How did you train for the event

I followed the Los Angeles Road Runners level 3 plan pretty well. I made >90% of my training runs, only skipping if I was sick. The training paid off. I also implemented a new rule. No long runs over 5 hours. At 5 hours, no matter the distance, I would just stop and call it a day. So I didn't do an 18 or 20 miler this year.

Gear and Nutrition

I got a new hydration bladder, 1.5 Liters. I didn't go for 2 liters because my backpack is on the small side, and more water just makes it heavier. I ended up refilling the bladder three times, and I didn't stop to use the toilets once, which tells me that I must have been sweating a lot. I drank Electrolit at each station where they were offering it. At each water station, I used the water to douse my arms and head, and used my bladder for drinking.
I'm very proud of my fueling strategy this year. I set a fifteen-minute timer on my phone. I would alternate between carbs and electrolytes. I didn't start feeling any GI distress until mile 24. This is a big improvement over last year, when I started to feel the same way at mile 17. I would eat one Gu or 3 Clif bloks and that's it, every 30 minutes. Super simple. I would chew one SaltStick FastChew every 30 minutes.

Specific experiences

I got to run with a friend through miles 14, 15, and 16. It was really nice to reset my brain and give my headphones a break. My Disney playlist came in very handy. I did exactly what I practiced in training. If I could sing along, I was going slow enough. If I couldn't sing, if I was too out of breath, I would slow down.
I have learned so much from the Rise and Run podcast. I learned how to PR in fun. Jeff Galloway was definitely looking out for me. I learned how to take pride in celebrating the back of the pack. I have learned not to get upset when the water stations run out of water or the fuel stations run out of fuel. I do most of my training runs alone, unsupported, and I brought a huge amount of fuel with me.
It looks like I was using my intervals for about the first half, until I met my friend. She was struggling, and we walked together. I'm actually happy because it allowed me to keep some energy for the last eight miles, which I walked alone. The organizers gave people the option to stop at 18, and still get a medal, which my friend did. It was the right choice for her. I felt strong and decided to keep going.
Run Club Row came through for me big time this year. I stopped at the Running Mamis tent for a hug and left with a cooling towel. That towel saved me. Lots and lots of volunteers re-wet the towel with ice water. I mean, just spectators. The official water stations dried up. Like before mile 17. Around that time, even though it was only noon, officials started telling us to get on the sidewalk. That's when I started hustling a bit because I didn’t want to be swept at mile 18. The party pacers, kind of like balloon ladies, passed me very early on. Much earlier than last year. I felt a kind of panic, but also not because the LA Road Runners coach assured us that gear check, late water stations, and medical would be available until 5 or 6pm, so I didn't feel the need to rush. I beat the garbage trucks and street sweepers, so that felt good.

Finish and associated emotion

I didn't cross the finish line with any friends, and I didn't see my coach there, but I was still very proud of my effort. I didn't cry at the end, but I did cry at mile 19 after the love from the Running Mamis. I was just so grateful for the support of strong women, especially on International Women's Day. I felt like finishing a marathon is actually easier than giving birth, and women are designed for it. I saw so many strong women out there on the course, and it was extremely inspiring. I finished only 20 minutes later than last year, despite it being significantly hotter, so I feel like I did improve.

Overall evaluation of the event

I recommend this event if you want to see a lot of the city. The spectators didn't let me down; it was a huge party. The energy was hyped, and the vibes were off the chart. I made it a priority to post to my Instagram story each mile, and it felt like the race went by so fast. Other people were suffering, but I was having a mental sadness that it was going by too fast. I guess I can thank my training. And my coaches. I did prepare mentally by doing a 10-mile training run, one week before race day, walking the first 6 miles. That's the LA Marathon strategy. Most of the hills are in the first 6 miles, so if you can regulate your pace, then you'll have energy for the rest.

the ritual

As I was getting ready for my long run today, I started feeling a sense of appreciation for the ritual. It's so important not to skip any steps. 

I drink a cup of coffee while braiding my hair. It's important that my hair is in a protective hairstyle, and I can do this quietly while others in the house are still sleeping. Also, I use the toilet to poop. 

I put my phone, headphones, and smartwatch on their chargers. Then I eat something, like a package of Belvita. https://share.google/w67B3NIJqyfyCcGKw

I start by preparing my groin area. Ride in Comfort with Chamois Butt'r Her - The Women's Choice for Chafe Prevention! https://share.google/AXXgVwbwpT5EpmNrl

Then, I put on shorts or a skort. Next, I lubricate my ribcage. Any fold of skin where skin touches skin is a good place to lubricate. Body Glide Anti Chafe https://share.google/hCdNtJJJbrdWAo1rV

I go all the way around my torso along the bra line. I do my armpits and the top of my arms. This entire ritual is evidence-based, covering all hotspots that have chafed earlier in the season.

I put on my bra(s), shirt, and arm sleeves. I put compression sleeves on my calves. Then, I turn my attention to the feet.

I check my toenails to make sure they are not sharp. I slather a generous amount of Chamois Buttr between my toes, on the tops of my toes, on the bottoms of my toes, on the sides of my toes, on the arch of my foot, and on my heel. Chamois Buttr https://share.google/18zdtP8BoUTy176WY

Then I put on socks and shoes.

Feetures Elite Light Cushion No Show Tab Socks https://share.google/kLUV8Ejhtm8OhFOJ1

I dress my wrists by adding the smartwatch when it's charged. I add some friendship bracelets and a sweat wristband to clip my GymBoss to. I use a Junk headband to cover my ears and headphones, then a hat or visor and sunglasses.

My husband said that since I'm big-chested, I have had to take special consideration with my running outfit, maybe more than other people. I'm not sure if that is true, since anyone of any size can experience chafing. I practice fueling on all long runs. Even if I didn't get 20 miles in today, I still feel ready for the marathon. 

My new training strategy has been no runs over 5 hours. I'll let you know how it goes. The idea was that running longer than 5 hours does more damage than it helps you adapt. 

winter olympics

I had a crazy nightmare last night. I was at a base camp in the mountains. Staying at a bougie ski chalet. Having the time of our lives. Hot cocoa. Jacuzzi. Lush. Selfies. Fur coats. Glam. Good conversations with exciting strangers who also love active living and travel.

Then it dawns upon me. Why I am there. I remember that I registered for a 100 mile ultramarathon. In the cold. In the mountains. I have to stay in athlete housing. Bunks. I am the only female signed up for this race. There are only 12 people doing the race.

I take all my luggage and put it on a bunk bed. I try to sleep. I wake up and go to the bathroom. Someone had moved all my stuff to a different bed. I had to find it in the dark. The night before the race.

I got up to pee again and someone moved my stuff again and this time, like musical chairs, there were no more empty beds because more people had arrived in the middle of the night. So I just went down to the lobby. 

That's when I realized all the gear I packed was for California weather, not cold gear. I didn’t even have gloves. I had a light jacket, not even a windbreaker. I started to really panic. I started beating myself up for being unprepared. I started thinking there was a very real possibility I would die out there on the mountain.

When the other participants woke up, one guy offered me his snow pants and I got a parka and some gloves from somewhere. I thought I could still do the race. I might not finish, but I wouldn't die trying. Then I find out they make you strip down naked and have all your gear checked to make sure you aren't cheating.

Mind you, I'm the only woman. So there I am, a crazy Nebraskan-Californian with back rolls and saggy boobs and a fat ass... dancing in front of the judges and other participants and spectators. I wasn't embarrassed about my body, I was embarrassed that I was so unprepared. And I didn’t want it to reflect badly on me, women, mothers, Californians, Nebraskans, Americans. It was humiliating.

Besides being stripped naked, our gear was inspected. The snow pants that someone had "kindly" loaned me contained illegal, performance-enhancing valves, which the officials cut out. So my outfit ended up with holes in it, and almost ended up getting me disqualified.

So then I was left at the decision point. Run the race with all the holy gear, or quit before I start. Then I woke up.

I think it was about the Winter Olympics. And exploitation of women. And misogyny. And working in a male-dominated field. And feeling stressed about my training cycle. And the upcoming marathon. And generalized travel stress, like for a destination race. Like worrying about having forgotten something essential. And wondering what my next big challenge will be.

Lessons from being a dancer

I had the privilege of being a trained dancer. Which is to say YEARS of intense training. Almost every day. Sometimes twice a day. Lots of technique and few performances. Literally years of just learning how to point my foot, which muscles to use, and what "doing it correctly" feels like. Years of staring in the mirror, years of getting corrections from master teachers.

There are things I learned along the way. Like, it takes years to get okay at doing something. Some of us will train for a decade and never become a prima ballerina. I think this helps me in my running. Like I will never qualify for Boston, I am not on a masters track team. It doesn't mean I don't enjoy running for the sheer feeling of being in this body and doing the damn thing.

I learned, through dance, that you must listen to your body. There will be days when you feel strong, some days you feel extra flexible, some days you're in your feelings and you can dance with more emotion. Some days you need to sit down and rest. You can't be in top form all the time. You sometimes have to perform at less than 100%. The show must go on.

I learned that stretching is life. You must stretch. For hours. Per day. Small movements can add up to a stronger body. Especially if you do them regularly, like every day. Multiple times throughout the day.

From dance, I learned about breathing through a movement. I learned how to sit with discomfort. I learned how to find the calm even while your body is doing amazing things. I learned how to remain centered. I learned how to remain grounded. I learned about how a lot of your power comes from your foot. Yes, the thighs are amazing, and so is the booty. 

Dance taught me to cultivate a strong core. The basic dance warm up emphasizes fluidity of the spine. You're going to stretch your back, you're going to stretch and warm up your hips. Dance taught me to never skip your warm up exercises.

There is a dark side to dance. Constant pressure to shrink your body. I know it exists in sports like gymnastics and cycling, too. I don't miss that part of it. I appreciate that running allows me to fuel my body with less shame and judgement. I wonder how the GLP-1 craze has impacted the dance world. I imagine it's rampant.

I'm tapping back into my dance roots this session of RunClub+. I decided to post a video after each run instead of a static photo. It's going well and I am starting to remember how dance brings me a lot of joy. It's not important to me how it looks to anyone else, just like my running. I'm not trying to be the poster child for dance or running. But I do enjoy both.

Sparkle Season

I am already exhausted. The pressure to create the holiday magic is so real. I don't know if it actually brings me joy or am I a product of my culture. Like, am I just acculterated to feel like I must do these things:

Bake cookies

Decorate a tree

Buy gifts for people

Wrap the gifts

Hang stockings

Get stocking staffers

Plan a holiday meal / menu

Plan holiday experiences

Watch holiday movies

Drink holiday drinks

All while teaching six classes, leading a run club, and doing normal stuff like laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, meal prep, and trying like hell to drink enough water and not forget to do anything important.

I surround myself with calendars and to do lists. I am literally terrified of forgetting something. Thoughts flit into my consciousness and then right back out again just as quickly. I can't write them down fast enough and I can't remember what I already forgot.

I want the holidays to sparkle but I am not home enough to enjoy the decor. I have no idea what gifts I have already. I may have sent gifts to people. I bought holiday cards and stamps but I don't know when I will have the chance to address them, write a message, and put them in the mail.

My eye is twitching. It has been doing this for about 4 days. I'm worried it's due to stress and dehydration.

perimenopause or not?

I have been having such pain in my feet lately. I don't know if it's perimenopause or not. Maybe I did too many miles too quickly. But what I wonder about is my mom and my aunt saying that they stayed active until a certain age until their feet and lower joints hurt too much. Then they put on weight until they lost most all of their mobility. I feel scared that this will happen to me now that I am approaching midlife. I can't help but wonder if HRT would fix this.

My doctor suspects that I am now sensitive to high salt. I don't know about that.

OKAY I can confirm that my hormones were officially completely jacked up this cycle. It's been 6 days since my predicted day 1 of my period and nothing so far. It felt like my body tried to ovulate on cycle day 24 or 25. Now it's cycle day 32 and I'm crying for no reason, very emotional like PMS. I don't know if and when I will menstruate this cycle. I also don't know how to count the cycle days unless I just assume this period skipped and just count cycle day 1 from the fitbit app's prediction of September 12.

June 27-July 2 brown blood and very light flow / spotting whole menstruation

July 22-27 normal period

August 17-22 normal period

September 12-17 skipped (or very late period)

August 2025 in Review

It's only a few days into September, but it's been a whirlwind the past couple weeks. I have to pause and remind myself that Albert has only been in Kindergarten for three weeks (as he reminded me today is day 14). I have only had one week of school so far. Since I'm teaching labs, there are no class meetings this week since it is the week of a Monday holiday (Labor Day), so that no sections fall behind. When I look back at what we did during August, I can see why I feel so whirly.

The month kicked off with the Dopey Strong 7 Dwarves Challenge. Each day, we were supposed to dress up like a different dwarf and add a few strength moves into our running plan. Then on the 7th day we were supposed to do all the strength moves. I'm not a big fan of run streaking but there were only three days in the month that I didn't at least walk a mile (Aug 8, 10, 12). Sometimes I wonder why I track everything, but then I remember that tracking helps me make sense of the pain I'm in when I can't understand or remember why my feet hurt so much.

  

There was also a collaboration between Valley Runners and the Goodr Cabana. A group of us from Glendale, Sherman Oaks, Northridge, Winnetka, Burbank (all over the 818) met in Venice Beach every Saturday throughout August.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by VRLA| ValleyRunnersLA Est. 2014 (@valleyrunnersla)

And to end the month, Crowned Athletics inspired us to dress up for World Princess Week.

I had fun with the challenge, and it got me to do some micro-blogging reflecting on what the Disney princesses mean to me.

CREATIVITY. As a mom, I get creative with my son as we paint, build, dance, cook, sing, and play. As a teacher, I find creative ways to incorporate all that into a college environment. Keeping everyone's spirits up while still enforcing safety rules and regulations. Chemistry doesn't have to be boring! I've got a dream. I want to make chemistry accessible to all students, allowing them to enjoy and learn. 👩‍🔬🥼🥽🧪 Rebel princess 👸✊ My first thought of creativity was Rapunzel, who had to pass away the hours locked away in a tower. But I think I'm a rebel princess at heart. Every day, finding creative ways to resist the empire. @crownedathletics #spacebuns #onebadmotherrunner

STRENGTH in motherhood is sometimes carrying your child, carrying your 50 lb folded stroller as you board the bus, bringing in the entire load of groceries from the car to the house in one haul. 🛒🛍️ Sometimes strength in motherhood is breaking generational trauma, escaping the unreasonable expectations of society, and giving other women a leg up. We all show our strength in different ways, and sometimes just showing up as the best version of you takes strength. 🥂 🙌 Here's a high five to celebrate all of the invisible unpaid domestic labor. Sometimes we carry the weight of the family on our shoulders, And even though every day isn't a ball, We still find big and small ways to sparkle and shine through. Thank you for being a part of my family, And thank you for helping to keep me inspired! #gratitude #strengthinmotherhood If I could add one piece to my Powerful Hermana set, it would be the Force Fighter flow tank top. 🛸💫🚀 I recently introduced my son to the Star Wars movies, and I was so inspired by Rey Skywalker. I'm not sure if she is considered a princess, but she is definitely a role model of strength. She never stopped fighting for freedom, and she never lost hope. No family is perfect, but finding your identity and drawing strength from your ancestors has always been a powerful force for me.

KINDNESS. The story of The Little Mermaid reminds us to practice kindness with our own bodies. There may be some part of your body that you wish were different. #bodypositive Ariel is doomed to want something she cannot have. She is willing to gamble her voice in exchange for the opportunity to experience her heart's desire, but only for 3 days. And if she is unable to achieve a nearly impossible task, she loses everything. The mermaid princess reminds us to appreciate everything our bodies can do. Today I am grateful for my legs. 🦵🧜‍♀️ 🐚🐠 Thank you, legs, for being my favorite form of transportation. Today I am thankful for my voice. 🎵🎶👩‍🎤 Thank you, voice, for allowing me to express myself. Staying inspired is sometimes a challenge. I have to do whatever motivates me to get out there and stick to my training plan. 

BELLA IN SELLA. is a phrase that I learned from the cycling community 🚴‍♀️ #cyclomania. It means riding a horse or bicycle and looking good while doing it. Often, I wear bright colors while riding or running for safety purposes. If you're seen, so much the better, because it lowers the risk of getting into a collision. And a close family member of mine was killed while running because she was hit by a minivan. But sometimes, like this week, I enjoy dressing up just for the fun of it. I find inspiration in the stories I grew up listening to. I wanted to represent Belle today, who didn't start out as a princess, but through her kindness, she came to love the Beast. I identified with Belle because she loved books and was a gorgeous brunette, like me. And, like her, I fell in love with a man who had a great bookshelf. 📚 # Bibliophile: I get to refresh my memory on Disney princesses, villains, and heroines by telling bedtime stories to my son as he falls asleep. He doesn't consciously remember every story, but I know he hears me. He puts princess figurines all around our bedroom for protection. Loving the energy from @fit4mom_west_sfv this morning. Showing up and being surrounded by kindness, moms supporting other moms, makes the journey of motherhood so much better. #communityinmotherhood #raisekindhumans #momssupportmoms #ourvillage #motherhoodsisterhood #worldprincessweek

GRACE. If you are newly postpartum or raising small children, you've got to give yourself grace. It's going to take time to get your energy back. Motherhood has been a powerful motivator for me. I want to be able to keep up with my son, so I keep pushing myself to stay strong and ready. Initially, when I thought of grace, I thought of Mulan. I'm not sure Princess is part of her back story, but she was a strong influence in my childhood. I was a tomboy. I ended up in a male-dominated career field. I've always tried to keep up with men and fit in among them. To be just as smart, fast, and strong. Mulan did what she did to protect her father and bring honor to her family. She was an epic failure at being a #tradwife but an epic success at leading an army. She exceeded her family's expectations and ended up with an even better match than any matchmaker would have found for her. Mulan reminds us to gracefully pursue our destiny, even if it doesn't fit with society's expectations for us. I thought about the graceful movements of a swords(wo)man. I realize that the modern military is different than the fighting style depicted in Mulan. I feel grateful for our military service men and women. Thanks to our veterans and first responders as well. ⚔️ Finally, I thought about how some workouts are tough. You have to give yourself the grace to suck sometimes. The law of averages will balance it out eventually with a workout that kicks ass in a good way. Today I felt so strong, graceful, and fast. ⚖️ Keep showing up. #ownthecrown #stronglooksdifferent

BRAVE. The brave thing I did today was bring my kid to work. His school has a holiday but my school did not. Today's theme got me thinking about various times in my life where I took a leap of faith. One of the biggest leaps I took was when I moved to California. I knew the cost of living was going to be really high. But I also knew that ultimately it was where I wanted to be. I wasn't sure how it was going to work out, but I was brave enough to go for it with the faith that I would figure it out. The second biggest leap of faith that I took was going through IVF. It was so expensive with no guarantees. It was like going through puberty again at 39 years old. I had to confront some of my biggest fears and misconceptions about becoming a mother. Thankfully for us, it only took one round. I'm so grateful that I was brave enough to take these leaps of faith. Finishing my PhD at UC Riverside was such a significant moment in my life. Training for and completing the LA Marathon (while wearing my Changed Fate set) was no big deal after becoming a doctor and then becoming a mother. If you're thinking about chasing a big goal or taking a leap of faith in the direction of your dreams, consider this a gentle push in that direction. Be brave.

STROLLER MILES. On my way to inspire the next generation of chemistry and biochemistry graduate students with my stroller and kindergartner, I dictated a lot of these microblogs while walking to and from school. Thanks to my bestie, Mykel for reminding me that it's okay to parent in public and that allowing students to see the joys and challenges of having children is a good thing. It's essential to make the work-life balancing act more visible. And this is also a post of appreciation for @bobgearus. I brought all the necessary items for my child and myself, as well as the supplies for my students. We had a fun day on campus. I love this stroller so much. I'll forever remember this as the vehicle that made all of our Disneyland dreams come true. BOB is an acronym for Beast of Burden, which is also a great song by the Rolling Stones. My Changed Fate set gives me powerful mama bear vibes when I need to remember how being a mom is my superpower. I also love how Merida was the shot caller in her story. She repairs the strained relationship with her mother and learns how to be more selfless. Even though Fit4Mom now pairs with Thule as their official stroller, I will never forget the BOB as my favorite part of strolling with my mini-me. My stroller model is BOB Revolution CE = City Edition which weighs ONLY 23 lbs.

I tried my darndest to get through August without overdosing on ibuprofen. However, on August 31st, I finally took some ibuprofen, which relieved the pain in my feet. It was an increase in miles, too much, too soon. I forgot how school drop-off adds extra mileage to the week. But as I say, we're trying to ease into the school year, and it's okay if there are some growing pains. Albert asked me to make him a social battery indicator so that he can have time to recharge without us bothering him too much. He's always had a high emotional intelligence, and this just shows that he can ask for a way to communicate with us.

   

Another thing Albert did recently was create two paintings contrasting a poor person's house, which was small, only one story high, and made of reclaimed materials. Versus a rich person's home, which he called the Eiffel Tower, which was multilevel, taller than trees, and made of gold. And for some reason, the poor person is during the day, and the rich person is painted at night, surrounded by stars. This is likely due to my lighter teaching load, which results in less income, and we often discuss this. We tell Albert that we can't afford some things because mommy won't be bringing home as much money. We discuss how we'll need to acquire more items on Buy Nothing, as we can't purchase them. September was a "normal" paycheck, but it will probably be the last "big" one for the next 6 months.

I saw the hashtag #RecessionCore and others, such as #economytok or #costofliving, to express a theme of economic hardship and austerity. We're not the only ones affected by this change in lifestyle. #budgetfriendly #economicanxiety #savingmoney #thrift #tariffs I've never been overly concerned with being trendy, and I know I'm talking about budget here, but here are some things I did buy this summer (or last summer) that I (still) love. 

• ENERBLOOM Women's Yoga Jumpsuits Workout One Piece Rompers with Pockets Bodycon Backless Bodysuits Padded Berry Red X-Large. I wore this on a run, and someone told me I was a whole vibe. I had a SheFit bra underneath and my sequin headband. $19.99 I also wore it to the pool as a swimsuit. I don't know why they don't make more swimsuits like this.
• Neely Gracey, the mom and running coach, recommended this product as the most comfortable item for summer, and I wholeheartedly agree. I bought one of each color and walked out paying around $50. I like them a lot. I'm glad I bought them when I did. This athletic all-in-one dress trend reached Crowned Athletics, and they sold each one for $118. I know, girl math, but I feel like I saved over $300. https://www.costco.com/elle-sport-women's-active-tank-dress.product.4000293912.html
• WEBGGER 12 Pack Sequin Headbands Elastic Stretch Sparkly Fashion Headband for Teens Girls Women Hairband Sport Head Band Party Favors Multicolored now $5.94, usually $9.99 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09Z2TH288 Honestly, these are the best for summer. The airflow through the sequins is peak performance, and the sparklyness and color choices in this variety pack make my heart happy. I didn't bring one on my trip to Nebraska this year, but thankfully, I had left one the previous summer, and it was still there for me to use while I was visiting. Honestly, lifesaver. Somehow, the sequins are a great way to keep baby hairs from straying. I can't stand when my hair tickles my neck.
• IDALOP 20 Pairs Cute & Colorful Striped Quarter Crew Women's Colored Socks, Size 9-11 $19.99 So I'm midlife. I have mostly ankle socks. But I noticed when I wear a short skirt, it looks like SO MUCH LEG all the way down to the ankle. People nowadays say that ankle socks are out. So I got these crew socks. I wouldn't care fashion-wise but I do teach college-age students and I don't want to appear too out of touch.

I also found three pairs of jeggings at ALDI this week. Light blue, dark blue, and light grey. I have some Levi's jeggings that I purchased in the Spring 2023 semester for $27 each. They're finally starting to show daylight in the inner-thigh area after 5 semesters (2.5 years). So these ALDI ones are about half the price. I can't comment yet to their durability since I haven't even washed them yet, but I will use them to teach in for several years probably. I tried on XL and L and the large I couldn't even button / zip. There was a gap in the back of the XL but I guess I can wear a belt. https://www.aldi.us/product/serra-ladies-premium-light-blue-jeggings-m-0000000000072022 $12.99

My aunt noticed my Instagram is looking more colorful these days. I appreciate all the people who inspire me to keep being expressive. I'm glad summer is over, but is it really? We just had our AC fixed today, thank goodness. I know we're in for a few more months of heat. Sometimes it's in triple digits even through the end of October. Albert and I decorated the house yesterday for fall. He was insisting that it be fall but not spooky. Which means leaves and pumpkins, but not haunted houses and jack-o-lanterns.

Albert is dedicated to being a ghost for Halloween, and I've got 3 costumes already, so that the whole family can participate. I'm not sure we're doing the Boo at the Zoo or the Enchanted Halloweekends at the Discovery Cube. We've let all our memberships go. So we need to find a trick-or-treat thing we can do for free. I'm trying my best not to buy the Bath & Body Works Disney Villains collection. I know it will sell out quickly, but do I really need more lotion and hand soap?

It's the weekend of the Santa Monica Classic and the Disneyland Halloween Half-marathon. I'll be sitting these races out and preparing for the Bimbo Global 10k on September 28th. I haven't done that one before, but registration was free, and it's closer to our house. I received a free sample of Ever&Eden Premium Mineral Sunscreen Lotion SPF 50, but I'm not impressed with it so far. These are more of my favorites that I buy again and again and use daily.

• Sun Bum Baby Bum Mineral SPF 50 Sunscreen Stick - Hawaii 104 Act Compliant (Without Octinoxate & Oxybenzone) - UVA/UVB Face and Body Protection - Unscented for Sensitive Skin - Travel Size 0.45 Oz $12.50
• Eucerin Sun Sensitive Mineral Baby Sunscreen Lotion SPF 50 with Zinc Oxide Protection, Hypoallergenic Mineral Sunscreen for Babies, Tear Free and Fragrance Free, 4 Fl Oz Tube $20
• Banana Boat Kids MAX Protect & Play Sunscreen Spray SPF 100, 6oz | Clear Spray Sunscreen, Kids Sunscreen Spray, Kids Sunblock Spray, Kids Spray Sunscreen, Kids Sunscreen SPF 100, 6oz $14
• Neutrogena Pure & Free Baby Mineral Sunscreen Lotion with Broad Spectrum SPF 50 & Zinc Oxide, Water-Resistant, Hypoallergenic & Tear-Free Baby Sunscreen, 3 fl. oz, 3 pk $37
• https://thinksun.com/products/think-everyday-face-sunscreen-2oz-naturally-tinted  $16.50

In my efforts to save money, I also cleaned out my cabinets and put all my backstock of personal care products in rotation. Our good friend used to work at Paul Mitchell and would always gift us products whenever we visited him. So I have some shampoos, conditioners, and gels that will be on our bathroom shelves until they're gone. I lived so frugally when I started this blog, while in grad school. I know how to do it, I just wish I didn't have to.

Finally, I realized we're only six weeks away from the Mission Inn Run. I'm totally looking forward to that. I haven't thought about my outfits for race day. But I have time to come up with something. 

New Shoe New You

Our campus got a new toy, the BrandU photo booth. Mike and I went over there yesterday to take our headshots. It was my previous CSUN headshot that led me back to running, so I'm grateful for that. But I was hoping for a do-over because I feel like I have at least one less chin now. And it's subtle, but I have new glasses. They're the same frame style but a slightly different color.

FA23

FA25

I want to devote a short segment to gratitude for my shoes. Honestly, I don't know how many miles are on the current shoes I own, but I do think it's time to retire the Ariel 20s. It's also time to let go of the Ghost 13s that I got from Poshmark. The reason is that I can feel my toe hitting the end of the shoe. It's actually uncomfortable and after a day of wearing them, I feel my toenail on my big toe hurts.

https://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2024/10/consumables.html

I have to be very frugal, and I hate throwing things away that aren't completely obliterated. However, I don't want a massive pile of shoes by the door that I'm afraid to throw away. 

• June 2024 grey green Ariel 20 via Amazon = $92
• November 2024 grey green Ariel 20 via Amazon = $106.33
• March 2024 black/grey/white Ariel GTS 23 via Fleet Feet Encino = $160
• August 2024 Grey/Black/Pink Ariel GTS 23 via Amazon = $119.95
• February 2025 New Balance Fresh Foam X 860 v14 via Fleet Feet = $140.00
• April 2025 Ariel GTS 24 COCONUT / CHATEAU / PORTABELLA via Amazon = $160
• August 2025 Ariel GTS 24 EBONY / BLACK / WHITE via Fleet Feet = $160
• August 2025 Ariel GTS 24 MERCURY / EBONY / SWEET LAVENDER via Fleet Feet = $160

So I think I'm feeling okay about this now, seeing that I've had the Ariel 20s for a year and I still love them, and I had two other pairs in the intervening time, which I didn't love, probably because they were the wrong size. So I will likely want to buy more shoes around the holidays or afterwards (before the marathon). I actually hate the New Balance shoes. My feet hurt so much the day after I wear them. Like they're comfortable but not supportive. I understand that some people might want a lightweight shoe, but I prefer a supportive shoe that is heavier and more durable.

I had a really good summer. We did a lot of decluttering, and I'm preparing to sell some items at the consignment sale. I did a lot of cleaning. I didn't do a lot of running. June, especially, but also July, were light on miles. But the goal I had set for the year (2 miles per day), I have already met and surpassed.

Goal achieved!

I had an episode where my blood pressure surged. My doctor says it could be because of stress or excessive sodium. I came across the video below that discusses exactly the problem I've been having with histamine. It's so helpful to see this type of content, so I don't feel gaslighted. Gaslit?

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A post shared by Elevate MD (@elevatemdohio)

Looking forward to a new season with the LA Road Runners. Guessing the Santa Monica Classic (which I'm not running) is in 2 weeks.🌟 Orientation Sunday is 9/14 🌟 First Sunday of the season 9/21. I do feel like I've been doing my base building starting in July and continuing in August so I will be ready to get back in season. My run club that I oversee was a non-starter for this session. I'm not super optimistic about the Oct-Dec session either, since the holidays occupy many of those weekends, but we'll see if there's any interest.

The Disneyland Halloween half is also about 2 weeks away. I'd like to go down to Anaheim for a meet-up with the Run Fit Mama herself, Kristin Wentworth, troop 486 leader. Next week is World Princess Week, which is a holiday made up by Disney Parks. There are daily themes that have been set forth by Crowned Athletics.

https://www.runfitmama.net/trainingprograms/core-workout-plan-cinderella-royal-core-7j8s6 

https://www.crownedathletics.com/blogs/crowned-connections 

If you interact with each day's social media post, or for an extra entry, share a photo of yourself, you might win a Crowned Athletics set. Here's my loose plan for which princess goes with each day's theme. Depending on how you feel about the Disney movies, you might assign a different princess with each trait: creativity, strength, kindness, grace, and bravery.

Mon 8/25 - Creativity 

   Rapunzel / Tangled

   Tiana / Princess and the Frog

   Raya / and the Last Dragon

Tues 8/26 - Strength 

   Luisa / Encanto

   Elsa / Frozen

   Moana

Wed 8/27 - Kindness

   Snow White 

   Cinderella 

   Ariel / Little Mermaid 

Thu 8/28 - Grace

   Mulan

   Aurora / Sleeping Beauty 

   Belle / Beauty and the Beast

Fri 8/29 - Bravery

   Merida / Brave

   Jasmine / Aladdin

   Pocahontas

So I want to put together five outfits. Monday, I can wear my purple jumper and call that Tangled. Tuesday, I could wear my Powerful Hermana set. On Wednesday, I could wear my mermaid skirt / visor / tank top from Sparkle Athletic. Thursday, I teach two labs, so I'm not sure how I could represent any of those princesses, but the jumper I have to wear that isn't already taken is slate grey with a red shirt underneath. I could run in my red Arabian Nights top with the Poisoned Heart Villain athletic skort. Friday, I could wear my green jumper and my Changed Fate set. 

And finally: Monday 9/1 is Labor Day and also the kickoff to the RFF Cinderella Royal Core program. The fun thing is to go out and get a Cinderella latte, which is a pumpkin spice latte with a half pump pumpkin sauce and a half pump white mocha. In fact, I'm heading out now to pick up these sauces so that we can make it here at home.

https://athome.starbucks.com/recipe/pumpkin-spice-latte
https://athome.starbucks.com/recipe/homemade-pumpkin-spice-syrup 
I bought this but it's taking ages to arrive https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0D1TX4TL6

I'll end here. It feels like there's more to say. I wanted to do a quick check-in before the semester starts to have at least one post for August. I'm at peak optimism at the moment.  

We do not accept skinny bitch season

Do we think skinny is the goal? Who thinks that? Who is pushing that agenda? 
https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/06/style/pilates-politics-trump.html

Thank you Ilona Maher for pushing back on the skinny agenda.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DMDomCegq_L/?igsh=NW1hM3VvczVoandh

If you don't believe that fitness is political, check out the points articulated here.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DGuCtoVRJr0/?igsh=YTVkMGQ5a2kwM3Jh

Woman from the protest is calling out right-wing movements and the rise of skinny bitch season.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DIkVWhKN0yl/?igsh=MWJsZG04cHUzdmZnOA==

Ilona Maher, accepting the ESPY award, said, "Take up space. Pitch it faster. Run harder. Put another plate on the bar. And NEVER tone it down."

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DMMiRffuSWn/?igsh=cW96eGxmb3oyNWxq

Between full-time parenting, PMS, and perimenopause, it is so rare that my thoughts align with the ability to document. I hope you can find a moment of solitude and peace, and hope amid this day, which seems full of bad news. Trying to keep the perspective and put another plate on the bar. Stronger. Ready to put myself out there. Stand between ICE and a friend if need be. It's all so ridiculous since we're all on stolen land. All this fighting over billions of dollars. It's very male. Very ego. I am sure it can get worse, losing Colbert and NPR / PBS. 

My friend Amber Ruffin posted this about why we can't give up.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DMNv1oWPULP/?igsh=MXB3ajA2cnFvdm4wZg==

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A post shared by Kayla Kaiser (@hamerk02)

perimenopause

Here's what I wrote in January

Having drama in my head about perimenopause. My period came early and with a vengeance. I get itchy palms that are so bad, it wakes me up. I can't sleep 3 or 4 nights out of 7. I wonder if going through IVF brought on early menopause. I don't know if hormone replacement is a good thing or not, and I don't know if it will "fix" my symptoms. Also have high cholesterol now. Still breastfeeding Marchling. Haha, saying that out loud is scary, and also, I wouldn't want to tell a doctor b/c it's so uncommon. Running a marathon in March because I thought it would help dry up my milk and facilitate weaning, given the many long runs and early morning training sessions. Geez.

And like reconsidering if a repetitive activity like running is really the best thing for my body. Like I am starting to feel like the accumulation of pounding is taking its toll on my joints and muscles. The development is somewhat limited. I'm not sure if I could motivate myself to lift weights alone if it weren't for supporting some other goal.

And here's what I experienced in my last menstrual cycle (June)

I don't think I ovulated. I can usually feel the process of ovulation. During perimenopause, the ovulation seems like it's delayed about a week from whatever my period tracker says. I think it's always been that way, but ever since my egg retrieval, I can feel when I ovulate really badly from my right side. Sometimes I don't really feel the left one, but this last cycle I really couldn't feel it, and the hormones that usually ebb and flow seemed like they weren't even flowing. 

Then when it came to my period, the blood was brown for the first few days and the last few days. I have never seen anything like that in my life. Since my pregnancy, my periods have been really intense. Like a lot of red blood for a whole day and then the period is nearly done. But the blood has always come out red. I feel like it was definitely an anovulatory cycle.

The good news is that I had a Dexa Scan and Mammogram on Friday, May 23rd. The breast scan came back normal and the bone density scan came back normal also. I'm having an appointment with a dermatologist today. I don't know what to expect because I really wanted help with a skin tag but this dermatologist said specifically that they don't deal with skin tags. So I guess it will be another cancer screening. I requested a referral for a colonoscopy but I haven't got the paperwork yet so maybe it wasn't approved. I will follow up. 

I've had my new glasses for more than a month. They messaged me on June 5th to let me know that they were ready. I enjoy the new prescription and the bifocals. I had absolutely no problem adjusting to them. I guess my old glasses prescription was so out of date that it was a relief for my brain to have one that was more correct. Albert went to his pediatrician appointment on June 17th and he was 37th percentile for height and 32nd percentile for weight. The doctor asked if he could brush his teeth twice per day.

Now that I've done my health gauntlet, it's hard to believe that I was so scared. I mean yes, doctors don't listen and they don't always do what you ask, but it wasn't really that bad. Yes it was a pain to schedule everything and required being on hold for sometimes 45 minutes.