Babywearing Update: year 2

To update how much I ended up LOVING and using my babywearing stuff...

I used my Lillebaby complete airflow 6-in-1 a lot at home and on the go. I think I actually used the Ergo original carrier more because it was in the car and I wore Albert while we did our grocery shopping for a long time.

I started to notice that Albert was getting too tall to be worn safely so I bought some toddler-sized carriers.

The first one I picked up is a Lenny Lamb Diamond Weave toddler carrier (preschool) with an attached hood. The things I like about it are that the waist panel is very soft so it's good for wearing while sitting down.

The second one I found was a Toddler Tula Pirate Cove. I had heard lots of good things about Baby Tula as a brand. They are gender and size inclusive. I bought it from a person who lived near Disneyland and wore their toddlers often at the park.

The third one I scored was a Lillebaby CarryOn. It was in the original box and looked like it had never been worn. I understand that there are some kids that don't like to be worn, but my kid is 100% on board with it. I think it helps that we're still breastfeeding and it gives him easy access. It's also probably because he has been worn so much that he's very used to it.

The Lillebaby is in the car and it's good for workouts. It comes with a lumbar support. I have debated buying the tummy pad (to replace the lumbar support when doing a back carry). What I learned by attending a BabywearingLA meetup is that the shoulder straps should be tightened at the place close to kiddo when in back carry. Then if you're feeding in front carry, let those out. I would have never learned this on my own. But it does make a huge difference in comfort.

Moving on to a different style of carrier and that's the ring sling. The first one I got was cheap and I didn't really understand how it worked. By that time, it was pandemic lockdown and there was nobody to help me. I just gave it a try and it has been very well used. I like that it's easy to wash and dry because when my kid was young, he spit up A LOT. I felt like the number of times I washed my SSC was a bit hard on them because my original Ergo busted a seam in the shoulder.

The times I've found the ring sling to be most useful is sitting down. This was after a family dinner in a very crowded restraunt and I wore my kid instead of putting him in a high chair. This helped keep the aisles clear and allowed the servers to access our table more easily. I keep this smaller grey bamboo-linen sling in the car and I have used it MANY times when out and about. It's really compact and can fit easily in a diaper bag or stroller.

This is my monster ring sling that I bought to celebrate 1 year of breastfeeding. It's a Wildbird double linen pattern in Aurora. It's also extra long. The rings are black. I have used it nearly EVERY SINGLE DAY because the pandemic work-from-home period went on so long. I would spend HOURS in front of the computer with my kiddo snuggled up in this sling. It's so warm yet breathable. I think I would maybe have bought it used if I had been thinking, but also I wanted the extra length and it's hard to tell from used listings if it's the regular or extra long.

Yeah, I just convinced myself to buy a silk ring sling for 2 years of breastfeeding. It's safe to be used in the water and it will be fun to go swimming in the pool and ocean with this over the summer. Albert is also getting really into snuggling in the shower and it would be nice to wear him in there.

The last one I'll mention is the Deuter hiking backpack. The things I like about it are that it has extra storage capacity to bring along diapers and snacks. It has a sun shade that doesn't work 100% great at shielding the kiddo from the sun, but it's better than nothing.

SLINGS

Hip Baby Wrap Bamboo Linen Ring Sling (78") $50 but I got it for $40

Wildbird Double Linen Ring Sling (90") full price $95

Vienna Springs Dupioni Silk (standard = 74") $135 but I got it for $63

SSC

Infantino Flip 4-in-1 $30 but I got it as a gift

Ergobaby Bundle of Joy with infant insert $135 but I got it as a gift

Lillebaby Airflow 6-in-1 Carrier $120 but I got it for $37

Toddler SSC

Lenny Lamb Diamond Weave $200 but I got it for $50

Tula Baby Pirate Cove $170 but I got it for $85

Lillebaby CarryOn $150 but I got it for $75

HIKING

Deuter Kid Comfort 2 $300 but I got it for $30

Kelty Kids $295 but I got it for $48

All in all, we've saved over 1000 on babywearing stuff by buying used and receiving gifts.

MISC

Didymos size 5 $109 but I got it as a gift

This I actually used as a blanket on the way to daycare. I would love to learn more about how to use this. I see other women doing back carry very simply but I have not been able to get it to work.

I will say just one other thing in closing, I did indulge my curiosity and buy coordinating suck pads for the SSCs. They are nice because they actually cover the strap adjustment so that if Albert falls asleep he's not laying his little face on a piece of plastic. It's also nice that all of them included ribbons for him to chew on. When he's cutting teeth, he definitely chomps on the knotted ribbon. He also plays with it when he gets bored. I like that they are washable, detachable and fun colors and patterns. Highly recommend!

Read my original babywearing post here:

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/05/postpartum-part-9-babywearing.html

Returning to Work

 By golly, I'm finally returning to work after having a baby. It's been 2 years. I started my maternity leave officially on Valentine's day of 2020 and our campus reopened on Valentine's day 2022. I got the coveted spot at the campus daycare and today was Albert's first day.

I've been on an incredible spending spree to get myself all the pumping supplies I would give my best friend if I had an unlimited budget AND the hindsight for what I would have wanted as a new mom.

Let's begin with the huge tub of random stuff my friend gave me. This pump was in there along with a myriad of ziploc bags. I was totally overwhelmed by it all. There are a few things that are supposed to be bought new for each new baby and those parts are shown below.

Accessory Kit

Legendary Milk Duckbill Valve Set of 6

It's overwhelming because it's fucking overwhelming. Because there are valves and flanges and bottles and caps and tube and backflow protectors and it's all new and then there's a crying newborn and you have all your hormones going crazy.

So after 2 years, I finally got that Spectra out and tried using it. I also tried this wonderful hack that some people just rave about, using a nursing clip down bra as a pumping bra and it was no match for my hooters with these flanges that were digging into my skin. Very uncomfortable. Which led to a few more purchases.

Compatible with Pump In Style

Luckily, I found this on my local Facebook marketplace so I didn't have to buy it new. I didn't really think it through though because with the Spectra, the flanges didn't really fit through the holes provided in this pumping bra. Luckily, I had wanted to try Pumpin Pals flanges anyway and they were softer and wouldn't dig into my skin as much. Comfort = everything!

The basic package of flanges in Target is 24mm but the flanges that I have for my Medela -- that I actually like -- are 21mm. So I am hoping this set in size small will work for me. XS (15-18mm), Small, 18-23mm, Medium (24-27mm), Large (27-30mm) and XL (30-40mm). Only XS and S are in the silicone (flexible) material and the larger sizes are made of hard plastic.

And that brings me back to the pumping bag. I had been seeing bags from Sarah Wells that were really cute and functional for carrying pumping supplies back and forth and around wherever you need to go. I thought it would be a really nice treat to have a pretty bag for this new pump. After testing out the lactation space at my work, I realized that a coordinating Pumparoo bag is actually a must. It has a detachable waterproof mat that you can put down on a surface and a wetbag to transport your used pumping supplies. I am currently using a clear plastic ziploc bag with my Medela Pump In Style, which works okay, but this one is much prettier and matches the bag I got for my pump.

Here's the pumping bag, worn as a backpack with some of the stuff in it. It has a side pocket that you can use for a water bottle, cause you know breastfeeding mamas are thirsty as hell. So once you've pumped out the breastmilk, how do you safely store it and transport it back home to your little nugget? Enter Ceres Chill.

The chiller comes with an adapter and a lid and an inner chamber. It does not come with the three lids pictured here or the flanges or the bottle-top. What you can do is fill the outer chamber with icewater and pump your breastmilk directly into the inner chamber. Then you pop the inner chamber into the outer chamber using the adapter and bam you can keep your milk cold for 15 hours if you put 6 oz water and 7 oz ice in the outer chamber. You can combine milk over a 24 hour period into the inner chamber. You can scald the milk if you have high lipase (like me) in the inner chamber. Heat the milk 3-5 minutes (if you have a second outer chamber filled with boiling water) until it reaches 180º F then plunge the inner chamber back into the cold chiller. So I guess I'll be buying a second (or third) outer chamber and also a hot pot to boil water in my office, as well as a thermometer.

They even make a "Happily Ever After" set that has sippy cup tops for the inner chambers and a flip-top with infuser and straw for the outer chamber (chiller). It comes with a cute linen bag with the goddess logo. I remember when my son turned 1 and I bought a Wildbird double linen sling hoping it would facilitate our breastfeeding journey until age 2 and it definitely did. I can't tell you how many sling naps that kid has done while I've been working from home.

Here's what we were doing when Albert was a week old:

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/03/postpartum-part-1.html

This post was written when baby was 1 month old:

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/04/300-easter-in-time-of-covid-19-with-1.html

This pumping blog I wrote when my baby was 2 months old:

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/05/postpartum-part-6.html

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/05/my-boobs-can-tell-time.html 

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/05/postpartum-part-4.html

Here were my thoughts when Albert was 4 months old:

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/07/breastfeeding-truths.html

This breastfeeding blog I wrote when Albert was 8 months old:

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/11/what-i-didnt-know-about-breastfeeding.html 

Here's a cost comparison of how much $ we saved by breastfeeding and what things we bought that we actually used versus what we listed on our registry that we didn't actually need:

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2020/04/postpartum-part-3.html 

http://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2021/06/home-economics.html

January 2022 thoughts

1/3 - Milestone Monday - LO is obsessed with numbers and letters. And written words. He loves pointing at them and having me read them outloud. He finds numbers everywhere from the park, to the parking garage, and in my cookbooks. I never realized he was paying attention to those symbols but he is really eager. I am happy but also shocked.

1/4 - Tantrum Tuesday - Ended the evening yesterday with, "I am not your servant!" Directed at DH. It's hard getting back to work after 2 weeks at home. I get it. But he was asking me to bring him everything and leaving messes for me to clean up. I'm adjusting too! And after dealing with LO 24/7 (he's been out of daycare since Dec 8th) I need help and a break. I am hiding in the bedroom now, forcing DH to handle dinner and I just heard LO fall out of his high chair and he's wailing. I'm exhausted.

1/5 - Our little outing today was a mixed bag. I was going to be on time but I went to the wrong park. I got a call from daycare that got me flustered. We arrived at the correct park, LO went to play and I started doing my workout with another mom. LO pooped so we had to stop and change a diaper. Back to workout. Then LO wanted attention and snuggles and to nurse. OK, that was the end of the workout. I guess by typing it all out, it wasn't that bad. Kiddo was smiling and playing kinda independently for a good long while.

On the home front, DH is attending a funeral cross-country this weekend. Last minute planning. I declined to go along. So I'm just praying DH has a safe and normal trip (no canceled flight) and that he doesn't get sick. He has procrastinated getting his flu shot and COVID booster. I'm just like ugh. C'mon man. Do your own adulting. And when you do get sick, who's gonna help me care for LO? Just think about the consequences of your decisions. What if you die of COVID? Because that happens to some people. When can we stop framing COVID as a life/death scenario? Still don't know the cause of death of his friend. It's sad. I didn't attend my grandfather's funeral last month because it was too stressful to do a quick trip. I can't believe DH wanted me and LO to go along with him to the service of someone I've never met. Decisions are so hard to make right now.

1/7 - DH is away for the weekend and I'm home with LO for just 2 more weeks before I go back to teaching. My university is being pretty quiet on the topic of returning to in-person instruction, which is what is planned. I will teach a large (~80 person) lecture. The desks are NOT 6ft apart. I will double mask or get N95's. Who is paying for these glorious masks? Why are they $2-3 apiece? Do I need a new one each day or can they be reused? Will I need a microphone? Do I fill out the health questionnaire every day? Is contact tracing even possible when there is community spread? We get a daily email saying which buildings COVID-positive have used. Will it just say every building every day? Is that even useful info? Wishing now more than ever for the option to keep WFH. Don't know how we'll manage student absences and make-up work. Is it going to be just madness? How can I record each class meeting? I haven't been in a lecture hall since I was in my 2nd trimester with my marchling.

Edit to add: Breaking news is that our university is going to revert to virtual instruction for the first 3 weeks of the Spring semester. We have no details about how this will work and how laboratories and exams will be impacted. This was shared with me by my chair at 10am. So I guess there's that. Also it is sad that we have to buy our own PPE. Our university issued 10 cloth masks back at the start of the pandemic, but I have heard no news about whether they will provide KN95s. I looked on my university's info pages and they haven't been updated since March 2020! There was a forum for professors to swap tips and tricks but I don't think anyone is updating it for how to return to campus.

Oh hell no. I can't with this virus. Is it dangerous or not? With the wide range of mitigation strategies, it's hard to take it seriously. I just went back to my workout group in person this week after taking December off cause LO was sick and we are masking for outdoor, socially distant fitness. It's hard to workout in a mask but I feel better at least trying.

1/9 - Self-Care Sunday - DH is out of town and I've been alone with LO. We're doing all my favorite things. I love it. I realized that when DH is here, I can get so resentful when I feel DH is not doing enough to help me. Now that he's gone, I'm experiencing a level of joy that I haven't felt in a long time. So I guess I'm going to have to try to recreate this feeling when DH returns. Like I was the one creating all the misery. And I realized it. And I'm having so much fun going on dates with LO. And not worrying about keeping costs down. And not counting calories. And not worrying what other people think. Yes my kid might throw a tantrum in public and I can only do so much to keep it from happening, but I'm not going to stay home just because I don't want my kid to have a public meltdown. They end pretty quickly (the tantrums) when kiddo realizes that his crying isn't going to change my mind. We went to a fitness class, played at the park, ate at McDonald's, went to a recovery 12-step meeting in a park, walked and ate at IKEA. It was so fun. Today we're at the zoo.

December was miserable because LO was sick and it was raining so we couldn't go out. But now it's good weather and I'm taking advantage. Lots of steps.

Also I reconfigured my closet. Removed all things I don't wear and got about 30 new tops that I love. Now I can't wait to get dressed for work. One person sold me 100 pieces for $200 so I regifted everything that didn't fit me, which has been really fun.

1/13 - Got a 45 min massage after a workout while kiddo was spending the morning at daycare. Two thoughts: there is nothing wrong with kiddo going to daycare. There is no shame in needing help. You're not a bad mom for sending your child to someone else for a couple of hours.

Prior to that moment, I felt so empty and alone and useless. Hate that I have to work. Just not enjoying getting back into the routine. But maybe once we get going, I won't even notice. The friction of starting a new groove is so painful.

Second, it is ok to do what you need to do. Fill your cup. Paint. Talk with friends and family. Get a cute haircut. Laugh. Dance. I don't remember what it's like not to agonize over everything, every decision, due to this pandemic. But it felt good to have this thought. Maybe I should meditate more often.

I've only had one haircut in 2 years and I'm just not a fan of long hair (on myself). I'm going to spend time with a friend on Monday and try to get a spa appointment for Tuesday. Yes, COVID cases are so common right now, but this is my last week before school resumes, so it's my chance and I am going to take it. As my sister told me, it's like QE... yaaaas qween!

1/16 - Self Care Sunday - I. AM. BUYING. EVERYTHING. I got new shoes for fitness and I'm so happy about it. A new running belt. And registered for a 5k race that I've always wanted to do. A new headband. A new MAMA hat. A new running skirt. A new tank top that says MOM PWR.

I still have body oil leftover from when I was pregnant and trying to avoid stretch marks. I did a leg & foot self massage last night after LO went to sleep. Woke up this morning feeling so awesome. Getting a massage on Tuesday, at a place which has a Women's Spa • Dry & Steam Sauna • Jacuzzi (Cold & Hot) • Clay Room • Ice Room • Salt Room  • Relaxation Room. If you book a massage, you can use all the facilities. I know... Covid. But I need a break.

Daycare has asked us to send a paper face covering but say that LO will not be required to wear it. No cloth masks allowed.

1/17 - Milestone Monday - LO is obsessed with action songs. He loves "Wheels on the Bus" and does all the actions. He does "Let’s Tap" from CoComelon. Stomping and watching what mommy does. It's pretty freaking adorable.

1/18 - Tantrum Tuesday - LO is getting very particular about shoes. He wants to wear them in the house. Or not. He wants to wear them at the park. Or not. He wants to wear a specific pair. After getting dressed, he may want different shoes than whatever I put on him. I guess it's okay but I kinda miss the days where he would just wear whatever I picked out.

He gets a bit testy about taking off a jacket or vest, even when I feel like it's too warm. He likes to wear the monkey harness even though the head of the monkey blocks his view. If I try to take it off, he screams.

1/25 - Napped for 2h with LO yesterday. Such a luxury.

Today I have a 2h block to get work done (or shower) while DH is at work and LO is at daycare. Glorious!

I love my kiddo but he is doing this new shriek when he's not getting attention. It is (hopefully) just a phase. I am sure he's frustrated that he can't express himself. I'm like, dude use your words. And he's like, I can't talk yet, you know this.

LO woke up absolutely screaming in the middle of the night. Maybe he had a nightmare. He was grabbing his legs and feet. Maybe growing pains? I gave Tylenol and rocked in the rocking chair and eventually he went back down. DH even woke up. Haha.

Normally I handle all night wake-ups alone, but this was a whole-house alarm. Part of me was like yeah, welcome hubby, this kid wakes me up 2-3x per night EVERY NIGHT. I have been insulating DH from night wakeups for so long (18 months) by sleeping with LO in the guest room and letting DH get uninterrupted sleep. He's a light sleeper. And he never got to WFH during the pandemic.

1/30 - Self-Care Sunday - We got 4 new tires (all weather) for our minivan. This reduces my anxiety about driving on the freeway in the rain.

I have cut my hair only once since becoming pregnant with LO, so it's longer than it has been in 20 years. I'm learning about the Curly Girl method. It's expensive to buy all new products, but also if I have long hair, I want to do something with it. Kiddo seems kinda past the point of pulling on it for no reason. So far it is looking better and it's only been a week.

How will your lifestyle change once your Marchling has been fully vaccinated?

Right now we are unable to attend concerts indoors, due to the rules of the venue. I would like to try taking kiddo to orchestra, ballet or opera. I know it sounds ridiculous. But the campus performance space reserves 5 performances per year for children and right now they are restricted to age 5 or older. I saw a ballet with LO when he was in the womb in Feb 2020. So yeah I guess that's what I have to look forward to.