Citrus Heritage Run 2026 race report

The event itself: Where? How long? When? Weather?

The start line was between a park and a produce stand on Victoria Avenue, developed in the 1890s and now a historic, scenic parkway known for its beautiful medians with diverse trees and plants. We did the 10k course, my goal was to run with my husband and son. Our wedding was 18 years ago at that exact location. We ran right across the spot where we said our vows. It was "California cold," which means it was in the low 40s. Luckily the winds weren't too bad. It was dry and there was great visibility, not a cloud in the sky.

Course description and evaluation of event logistics

The course ran down Victoria briefly, down Jackson and into the Citrus State Historic Park. Miles 2 and 3 went all through the park, it was hilly and there were some off-road segments through the orange groves. Miles 4, 5, and 6 were on the roads, and we had scenic views of snow-capped mountains in the distance and palm tree-lined streets. The way the 5k, 10k, and half-marathon courses diverged and converged was so smooth. There were plenty of signs and volunteers to help runners find their way. The timing of when each race started made a lot of sense.

How did you train for the event

This week is a taper week for me on my journey to the LA Marathon. I have been training for 18 weeks, with 8 weeks to go. I had no time or pace goals, my goal was to stay together with my family, which we pretty much did.

Gear and Nutrition

I started out wearing a tank top, jacket and hoodie on top, with long tight pants and sweatpants on bottom. I had a headband covering my ears and gloves before the race started. Just before race start, I took off the hoodie, and gloves. By mile 3, I had taken off the sweatpants. Around mile 4, I took off the headband and put on a trucker hat. Honestly, we had a lot of snacks since we were running with the stroller, which also gave us a place to put our clothes that we were shedding. We ate popcorn and an apple around mile 2. They gave us gatorade, water, and orange slices. I think there were two or three fuel stops.

Specific experiences

There was a marching band in the orange groves around mile 2 or 3 and another band at mile 6. The last one was key because the last mile was a straightaway but due to elevation changes we couldn't see the finish line archway. But I knew it must be close because of the music. It was so fun and motivating.

Finish and associated emotion

My son sprinted across the finish line. We were about 5 or 10 minutes late to the kids race, so it was hard to figure out how to navigate that. If we do it again, we'll know. The kids race didn’t have a published course map and we weren't the only parents who were confused. But there's a packed dirt or gravel path that winds around the perimeter of the park, which the kids were expected to navigate. I think it would have been good for older kids. I didn't expect this but my kid ran the first 3 miles of the 10k and the last mile too. By the time of the kids race, he didn’t have much gas left in the tank. It was cute and I'll know for next time.

Overall evaluation of the event

There were enough port-a-potties. Bib pickup was easy. The finish line festival served fresh-squeezed orange juice, which was amazing. There were actually a lot of booths and tables set up to hang. We don't drink anymore, but they did offer a free beer for those who would want it. There was music, some recovery tables, and it was really nice. The event was so nostalgic for me, not only because of our wedding venue, but also because I was in a cycling club when I lived in Riverside. We did our time trial on those streets and I visualize that experience every time I run a magic mile. Nearly every route we biked went along Victoria Avenue at some point because it is such a wide, gorgeous boulevard with a bike lane. I have so many great memories of spending time walking or biking on it. 10/10 highly recommend and would do it again. 100% of the proceeds go to local high school cross-country programs, so the race feeds directly back into the running community. Good vibes.

self-love

What is the greatest love of all? Learning to love yourself. Whitney Houston became a mom in 1993, but recorded this song in 1984.

Katy Perry became a mom in 2020, but recorded this song in 2010 when I was doing my internship in Germany. I remember hearing it on the radio and feeling so homesick for SoCal.

Miley Cyrus recorded Party in the USA in 2009. I loved hearing this song when I was in Germany. It made me homesick for Los Angeles and I wanted to hop a flight back right away. I didn't appreciate Miley as an artist too much at the time, but now she's one of my favorite icons. Being proud of the USA doesn't ring as true for me anymore, hopefully this country will check itself before it wrecks itself.

I listen to my Disney Hits playlist and one of the songs that hypes me up the most is this one by Hannah Montana. Miley says she's not ready for motherhood, but there's still time, she's only 31. Her memoir Miles to Go was published in 2009. I really enjoyed the memoir of Jessica Simpson called Open Book. She talks about going to the Disney auditions and how messed up the whole process was.

Niki Minaj became a mother in 2020, but recorded Super Bass in 2010. Honestly, I was having a tough week and I put on this song and immediately felt better. The years I spent working on my PhD were some of the darkest times in my life but I have such a strong connection to the music from that era. 

Meghan Trainor (has two children born 2021, 2023 both via C-section). She wrote "Dear Future Mama" published in 2023 after PTSD from her first delivery. The song came out in 2023 and the video stars the ultimate momager Mrs. Kris Jenner herself. I'm wondering why Kris hasn't run for president yet. WE NEED MORE WOMEN IN POWER. And moms especially because they understand the sacrifices made to create life.

Meghan wrote "Made You Look" after her therapist asked her to stare at herself in the mirror for 5 minutes. She's always touched on themes of body positivity, but this song is truly all about it. I remember seeing this on Disney's Magical Holiday Celebration in 2022. While all the other artists were singing Christmas songs, she went ahead and dropped this song while wearing hot pink. It felt out of place for the program, but I loved it. This would have been filmed while she was pregnant with her second baby.

Britney Spears (has two children born in 2005, 2006) recorded Gimme More in 2007 and Work Bitch in 2013. Sometimes I wonder if this sexualized version of Britney was her idea or some idiot man's idea. 2007 was the year she shaved all her hair off, which I also did in 2010. I didn't do it because she did it, but it's kind of cool that I also got to experience hair-less-ness. I did it for basically for the same mental health reasons, and also I didn't need the hair at the time. I was running half marathons every weekend for fun and it was just easier not to have to wash and style my hair.

It's so hard to believe that Gimme More was recorded one year after she had two children. She would have been 24-26 years old then. She recorded Work Bitch when she was 32, the same age I was when I finished my PhD, got sober, and started working at CSUN. The Woman in Me is her memoir published on October 24, 2023. I still haven't read it yet, but I want to.

Lizzo is such an icon I would need an entire post devoted to her. I don't think I heard this song before today. She wrote it in 2015.

Tempo is the Lizzo song I have on my running playlist. Honestly, my playlist is one of the big motivators in my arsenal. The last long run, my headphones died at mile 17, and I couldn't run without my music. I had to walk the last mile.

Love this song because it was the time when people were emerging from the pandemic quarantine. Everyone was so traumatized by the isolation and uncertainty. Lizzo welcomed us back, and this video was filmed at CSUN. I remember getting hyped up watching Watch Out for the Big Grrrls in 2022.

It was so significant to me that I actually acknowledged the following artists in my PhD dissertation. I could not have survived that program without my playlist. I blocked out all the haters and did my experiments in sync.

Beyonce became a mom in 2012 and had a set of twins in 2017. Homecoming: A Film by Beyoncé came out in 2019 and Beyonce did a halftime show on Christmas Day in 2024 that was epic. Run the World came out in 2011, which was during some dark times in my life. Rather than doing less after becoming a mom, it is arguable that Beyonce's best work has been done after she had children.

Lady Gaga released The Fame in 2008 and Born This Way in 2011. Her music spoke to me in a way that is not easily communicated. I would listen to the album from start to finish on my little mp3 player. It was a Sansa, and it saved my life. I don't know if I still have it or if it eventually went to e-waste. The Edge was like the climax of my PhD. I felt like I could do anything because I came through the fire. Sometimes I still wish I had the tracklist from that music player.

Rhianna has two children born in 2022 and 2023. The song I remember most is Shut Up And Drive but mostly because of RuPaul's Drag Race. The song was recorded in 2006 and released in 2007. Drag Race All Stars Season 2 Episode 5 aired in 2016, ten years later. Finally, Miss Justin aka Alyssa Edwards was crowned in 2024 the first place winner of Global All Stars, nearly another ten years later. "She's not old, she's established." I've always been obsessed with drag queens because who would willingly want to dress as a woman when you're a white man? Women have some power but we just need to learn how to flex it like men do.

Shakira released She Wolf in 2009 and then went on to have two children in 2013 and 2015. I'm so proud of the women who stepped up to the mic at the 2025 Grammy Awards and let us have it. I don't know but you might still be able to watch it on Paramount+. I really felt like these women have staying power. They have been around for a long time and are finally getting the recognition they deserve AND using their power to speak truth on behalf of more vulnerable people.

What about you? What would be on your playlist entitled: Anthems for the Resistance?

And also: Why don't we celebrate matrescence? I mean yes, we throw a baby shower, but it's somewhat of a celebration for the baby. The gifts are all for the baby. What about the mom? Where are her gifts? We as moms give up so much of ourselves, it's hard to put that in perspective. Where would our society be without moms? There would be a population crash for sure.

I feel like we really need the 4B movement and we need to speak up and act up. I feel like women are taught to sit down, be quiet, follow the rules, and basically give up our power. I think to some extent men hate us because we have the power to create life and they don't. They want to enslave us basically. And we end up hating ourselves because they hate us. That's the patriarchy. 

I've been so stuck at work, I've been thinking about all this and not able to sit down and do one bit of work. I'm sick of feeling like a raw nerve, so vulnerable. But that's the power of women also. We can be strong AND vulnerable. We can share our feelings and not be thought less of. Men keep making these rules and women keep following them. We need to step up and be leaders. The power given to women with Title IX needs to be magnified, strengthened, and flexed now. 

I know women can't do it all, it is very all-consuming to create life and raise children. But also, we need to demand the flexibility we need to parent AND work. We need to allow women to have babies AND feed them AND show up for work. Because if you're not sitting in the boardroom, your concerns and your needs and your perspective and your ideas (which have immense value) won't be taken into consideration. 

Yes I understand some of my anthems might not be your cup of tea. But maybe you want to take a moment to create your own power playlist. Listen to it, do some weightlifting. Then get out there and show up. Show up for the people in your life. Speak your truth. Be brutally honest. Be authentically yourself. We have to keep moving forward, we're not going back.

Bike Month and Month of Mama

I’ve been adding and deleting songs from my DANCE DANCE DANCE Amazon music playlist. If the song doesn’t keep me hyped while running, I delete it. If the tempo doesn’t seem right, I move it to earlier or later in the playlist. I keep increasing the playlist's duration as I progress into longer runs. I’m almost up to 6 hours now, but I will need more bangers for the LA Marathon training.

I've been keeping a list of running items that I love so it's easier to re-buy them or to recommend them to friends. https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/2QFV2N9VEFW0Q?ref_=wl_share

I do plan to bike to work on Thursday, May 16th, but it's not really necessary.

What I plan to do to celebrate Month of Mama is just to keep up with my running program. I got a book called "Master the Marathon," and it was super-readable. The author Ali Nolan talks about how she got a job as the features editor at Runner's World magazine. She has a BA in English literature and an MFA in creative writing. It shows! I loved how reading it felt like talking with a good friend. She was very candid about her first marathon experience and what a disaster it was. Because her goal was to *prove* that she belonged at Runner's World magazine by getting a Boston-Qualifying (very fast) time. She also admitted right away that she won't be the world's foremost expert in marathoning because she has only completed two, but that she was surrounded by much more experienced runners and coaches while writing the book.

I am inspired to speak to the question: Why enter a race?

I think entering a race is a great motivation to train. On the race-day, the race course is supported so you can run without carrying water. There are clear roadways and port-a-potties. More than these logistics, it's fun to run with a big group of people. When everyone is running together, something magical happens. You can vibe with the other runners and that just makes it fun. I never came from a family of runners and I kind of found it by accident. But after my first organized race, I was hooked. I realize that it might not motivate everyone, but maybe they just don't know how magical it is.

Runcation Debrief

We had our second runcation or racecation this past weekend, if you consider our runDisney weekend the first. This trip was so relaxing. We arrived at the OC Marathon expo around the time it opened. We parked and walked through the expo about 3 times. Then our nephew (who was actually running the marathon) arrived and we walked him through bib and t-shirt pick-up. Our son actually loved the expo and had a really fun time at the fairgrounds.

$12 for parking x 2 days (expo admission free)
$97 for pre-race food (grocery store and fast food)

$60 for post-race food (food truck and in-n-out)

$5 for race-day finish-line parking

$299 for hotel 

$37 for overnight parking

$522 total (45% of the cost of the runDisney weekend)

Then we went to a couple of stores while waiting for our hotel's check in time. We picked up a few groceries but could have bought a few more. We had brought a lot of food from home, but we didn't even know if the hotel would have a fridge available. Arriving at the hotel was great, the lobby was welcoming and fancy. Parking was easy. There were luggage carts available to take our stuff to the room. The room itself was great. There was a big sliding glass door to the balcony, which overlooked a lake with a waterfall and a fountain. 

3350 Avenue of the Arts

Costa Mesa, CA 92626

2 Queen Lake View Balcony

It was super peaceful in the room. We started binging a show on Netflix. When we got bored / hungry we went out with the car and got some fast food. Using our room key, we were able to leave and come back with no issues. We watched maybe one more episode of the show while eating and then went to bed. I laid out all my running clothes before falling asleep so I could get dressed quietly in the morning. I woke up around 4am and went out to run on the marathon course while the roads were closed. 

The room had a Keurig coffee maker and we had brought our own pods. The only thing I wished we would have had were:

• half and half
• my "Tron" running vest

Other than that, I felt our packing list was complete. We used everything we brought and we didn't bring anything extra. After my early morning run, I came back to the room at 5:30am and Albert wasn't even awake yet. It was great to go and check out the prices of room service and the restaurant in the hotel and then just eat what we brought because it saved us so much money.

The expo gave us some vitamin lemonade, some sports drinks, and some energy drinks, not to mention stickers and candy. Albert wanted to go back after the race but it wasn't there anymore. I also got some awesome compression sleeves personalized with fit4mom and a running woman.

Thank you @Kia @OCMarathon @FIT4MOMhq #runclub pic.twitter.com/TeV2E42aYL

— Dr. Kayla A. Kaiser (@hamerk02) May 7, 2024

Packing List

Overnight Duffel Bag
⭐Underwear (2), clean socks (2), PJs, Regular everyday bra (2), regular clothes outfit
⭐Running outfit (shorts / top), Running belt, Running shoes, Sports bra, running socks, running undies

⭐Toiletry bags, Night bag w/ earplugs and eye mask
⭐Pull-ups (2) + wipes
⭐Stickers, bedtime books, bag of cars
⭐Three hats, Three sunglasses
⭐Park bag/purse
⭐Snacklebox: Electrolyte tablets, Salt tablets, Gu, Bloks, fruit strips, Sesame crackers

(non-insulated) Snack Bag
⭐milk, juice
⭐banana
⭐goldfish
⭐Keurig pods
⭐Honey, Starbursts candy

Insulated Cooler
⭐watermelon, grapes, blueberries, strawberries
⭐Bagels, Cream cheese
⭐Pasta (with sauce)
⭐plastic fork, knife, reusable straws

BOB stroller

Race-day Timeline

5:30am Marathon begins
6:50am elite runners pass hotel
8:50am Jack arrived @ hotel
10:45am Jack finished marathon

I'm looking forward to the second half of May. I have some big things coming up. A last trip to Disneyland. A visit from my sister and my aunt and my niece. So some major girl power.

Awesome Sauce

It's hard to put into words the magical mama's visit I had with my sister and aunt recently. It was just so wonderful that it's hard to describe. It was the first significant get-together that we've had since the pandemic, and it was like an ointment or salve to heal my loneliness and isolation that had overshadowed most of my son's life.

We didn't have an agenda for the parks, but we did way more than either of us thought we might. Baby Evelyn's favorite ride was definitely the Little Mermaid, and we rode it twice without having to get off. It was amazing how the little ones were able to sneak in their naps between strolling and babywearing. We explored some things that were familiar to me and did some new things that I'd never done before, and everything was frosted with nostalgia.

We got Genie+ for our second park day and used it for Haunted Mansion and Small World, and it might seem insignificant, but it helped us skip many lines, especially in the afternoon. The parade was so great we both wept for its beauty. I don't want to minimize the whole experience by listing how much everything costs, but I am curious because I want to budget for the rest of the month and next month, and the month after that, haha. Summer is here, and I am trying to plan what we will do to stay busy, keep learning, and incorporate arts and crafts into our daily routines.

• 5/12 - airport pick-up, lunch, last lab ($5 for parking, $103 groceries)
• 5/13 - waffles, campus walk ($13 stroller hooks, $13 Mickey's ears)
• 5/14 - french toast, train, bus, hotel, downtown Disney ($12 pretzels, $27 sweets, $4 fruit)
• 5/15 - DCA, Disneyland, magic key terrace ($24 milk stand, $72 dinner, $65 Genie+)
• 5/16 - Disneyland, Tom Sawyer Island, train, van ($328 hotel, $6 milk, $12 fruit, $38 grey stuff)
• 5/17 - end of year celebration, groceries, meal prep ($24 toys, $32 toys, $151 groceries)
• 5/18 - tie-dye, dance medicine ($95 groceries, $72 gas)
• 5/19 - beach day, tie-dye ($6 parking, $98 for flowers)
• 5/20 - tie-dye breakfast, painting day, IKEA, thrift store ($72 clothes, $42 food)
• 5/21 - yoga in the park, pickup Fitlicious, painting day ($20 yoga, $135 food)
• 5/22 - packing, garden play, downtown Disney day 2 ($24 McDonald's, $22 corndogs, $15 parking, $13 sweets, $19 sweet potato fries & milk)
• 5/23 - airport dropoff ($69 gas, $3 parking)

I really do think we balanced low or no-cost stuff with pricey experiences. We also balanced gogo days with nogo days. For example, we kept everything simple the first two days (Friday and Saturday) and stayed home. It was our Mother's Day to spend with our kiddos at home. Then the next three days (Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday), we got caught up in go-go-go and nearly outdid ourselves. After returning home, we had a couple of chill days (Wednesday and Thursday), where we stayed home and did some cooking, cleaning, and domestic stuff.

The tie-dye was fun, relaxing, and also exhausting but memorable. We were chatting and tying in my garden, which I loved because I love spending time out there. I put in some flowers just to make the space colorful and inviting. It was like a Mother's Day gift to myself to make that space exactly what I wanted it to be for us to enjoy it. Everyone agreed the beach day was a fantastic idea (Friday). Good thing my ladies are all big fans of sunscreen, and I don't think anyone got burned the whole trip! We had a brunch on Saturday to send our aunt off with a full belly.

We really enjoyed all the flowers, trees, bushes, grass, and everything around us as inspiration for the painting with a twist at home. Over the weekend, my husband was helpful in watching the kiddo so that we could do a girls' trip to IKEA and a thrift store (Saturday and Sunday) and finish up our wishing well princess paintings. It was very fun to do yoga in the park, although my sister did the entire flow with a baby napping strapped to her body. We didn't make it out to any Fit4Mom workouts, but that's how it goes sometimes. I'll get back to it tomorrow...FriYay!

Finally, we packed on Monday and did another Disney trip to pick up some souvenirs. It was fun to try to fit in everything we didn't get to do, like corndogs, churros, Mickey cupcakes, popcorn, dole whips, and beignets. We didn't get to everything, but what we tasted was 100% worth the extra trip. We enjoyed different areas of downtown Disney, the Disneyland Hotel, the Grand Californian, and the Pixar Pier Hotel. Again, we did some things I had only heard about but didn't know how to do, so it's always good to do reconnaissance. 

I'm already looking forward to our Nebraska trip to visit with Albert's cousins and grandparents, which will be coming up here in about a month.

February 2022 thoughts

How will your lifestyle change once your Marchling has been fully vaccinated?

Right now we are unable to attend concerts indoors, due to the rules of the venue. I would like to try taking kiddo to orchestra, ballet or opera. I know it sounds ridiculous. But the campus performance space reserves 5 performances per year for children and right now they are restricted to age 5 or older. I saw a ballet with LO when he was in the womb in Feb 2020. So yeah I guess that's what I have to look forward to.

2/2 - The transition back to campus is underway. I cleaned my office and unboxed a new computer. Forgot a VGA cable so I didn't turn it on yet.

The computer on my desk had stopped communicating with Office 365 so I couldn't open any Word, ppt or xls files. And it was an instrument computer that I commandeered because my other one died mid-semester in Fall 2019 (when we were all pregnant). OMG so long ago, feels like a decade in pandemic years.

It's surreal to be back there after WFH for so long. All printers are out of toner. I had to throw out all food that expired 2020 or 2021. There is no ground coffee and no coffee filters. I put some student work in the "shred" bin which is completely full. I've been afraid to have them come and empty it because I was scared of having a stranger in my office during the pandemic. But I guess I had better put in the work order because I'm about to be seeing ~200 students per week, face-to-face in rooms where 6ft social distancing will be impossible.

We go from virtual to in-person during week 4 of the semester. So that's gonna be rough. Campus daycare offered us a spot, which I had wanted for so long. But now LO is kinda settled off-campus so I don't know what to do. We have to decide by Friday, 2/4.

I don't know whose brilliant idea it was to come back on Valentine's day, like "they're gonna love this." Thanks for listening to my stress ramble.

2/4 - Kiddo hasn't taken his shoes off for 4 days straight. I mean yes to change pants and socks but he wants them right back on. All night. All naps. Wierdo.

My dude is going through a phase with wooden puzzles. He has a linen bag for them and spent 45 minutes filling / dumping the bag over and over. I think he likes disappearing the pieces, hearing them drop in and clink, then scattering them and repeating the process.

2/5 - Lost sleep last night over our decision to pull LO out of his current daycare and switch to an on-campus daycare since DH and I both work on campus. I feel his baby days slipping away (haha maybe they're already gone. maybe they've been gone and I'm just holding on). I held him so tight while he slept. I laid awake and worried about doing 5 full days (40 hour week). Until now, we've only done 3 half days (12 hours).

It's so difficult because I've been super-stressed and trying to balance everything for 3 semesters of work-from-home with LO at home. I am at my breaking point and very behind on a project that I agreed to do this academic year. I'm only 25% done and I should be over 50% done. There is a tiny shred of my former self that NEEDS to have 40 hours of freedom to get my work done. But there is a huge part of my new identity as a mom that wants to spend all my time with LO and quit my job. He's so little. He shouldn't be going to "work" 40 hours per week. He needs his mom. Or am I just being dramatic?

I could definitely still keep him with me Mondays and Fridays and Wednesdays and only send him Tuesday/Thursday. Financially, we decided to switch him because comparing our old daycare ($390 / week) to this new one ($299/ week) we will save money comparing full-time at both places. We were easing LO into full time. He was just starting to get comfortable and we were planning to let him nap there starting this week. My heart is breaking and my body is saying this is a bad idea, but my rational mind and my work identity is saying we have to do this. Ugh.

By sharing with friends, I was reminded that it's not all-or-nothing. I am guilty of black-and-white thinking and tunnel vision. It's much better to envision our daycare as an adjustable wrench that can be dialed up or down.

2/7 - Dropped off paperwork for new daycare today so now we wait and continue as before until we hear otherwise. New daycare is going to draw up a contract and then I guess we'll get a start date. Change is hard.

I feel like pre-kiddo my life was "2 Fast 2 Furious" and my favorite quote was by Mario Andretti, "If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough." I had a 2-seater car and lived right by a freeway ramp. My commute was 40 miles each way and I would drive 80 mph. I worked from 7am to 10pm. Seriously I was so driven.

I still acknowledge that there are many things that are out of my control, but I feel like the fastest I want to go now is walking. I live 1 mile from work and LO's daycare is on the way. I have directed all my Type A energy into mom stuff and with kiddo potentially starting full-time daycare, it's a big identity shift.

Not to mention going back to work in person. Nobody has seen me except on Zoom (neck and head) for 2 years. So freaky. Mom bod on full display!

2/10 -  I'm obsessed with completing LO's baby book. Got it as a baby shower gift. Why? Kind of a blessing and a curse to feel the pressure to document every. single. milestone. The first year was the most intense. There was a page for every month. Now there's just one per year for birthdays.

We're kinda planning a Mickey Mouse Two-dles theme. Just 3 friends and LO's grandparents. Maybe aunt/uncle/cousins. I guess I should order a cake. It's gonna be outdoors, hopefully we have good weather. I'm kinda planning more gifts for the guests and not buying anything for LO.

I've met more cool moms through Buy Nothing on Facebook. It's fun meeting moms with kids just a bit younger (who we gift to) and just a bit older (who we get gifts from). Highly recommend!

A co-op sounds awesome! I always wonder if COVID has made finding daycare harder or easier. The one my kid attended for the past 3 months was never part-time pre-COVID but they were struggling to fill up so they loosened up their rules. It was the only way we could afford it (3-days/week). We couldn't afford their 5-day + early drop off fee.

I had my last WFH day today and it really feels like the end of an era. I was starting to feel the whole F#$% COVID sentiment leaving my body. Like things are actually returning to normal. I'm sure it's not the end of the pandemic, but we shall see whether a daycare situation pieced together may be more resilient and more functional than a rigid full-time setup?

We had our zoom meeting with LO's new campus daycare. He was on the waitlist since he was an embryo. We don't have a start date or drop-off schedule yet but it's affordable full-time care. And we got a spot! I feel like I won a lottery. I mean we did.

I got all excited that my friend from high school moved to my area. I thought we might be able to do kid swaps, but she lives 1 hour away so now we just do playdates every other week.

I totally get parent's frustration and disappointment with our daycare options. I think more people would be able to have kids if employers provided daycare like they provide health insurance. Or if there were public institutions that would care for littles from the moment our maternity leave ends.

On the flipside, I am torn between my desire to spend all my time with kiddo. That's what my body wants. But financially we need 2 incomes and I have been struggling so hard to WFH with LO here. My mental health is at a breaking point. We hope that we can work enough to keep ourselves engaged in our careers, stay current and make enough money. But also not run ourselves ragged trying to do all. the. things.

It's so hard to be productive with LO around. For example, I wrote a test in 3 hours yesterday while LO was in daycare. When I was trying to do it with kid around it literally took all weekend, like 16 hours because I was exhausted, and getting constantly interrupted.

2/11 - When life gets hard, I make rice Krispy treats. LO has acquired a taste for them. LO normally doesn't go for sweets but DH has a sweet tooth.

LO loves strawberry Jell-O which I started making in December when we were all sick. I am trying to be cool with this junk food.

We filled out an Ages & Stages Questionnaire (ASQ) for our move to the new daycare. Scored low on communication. Scored high in gross and fine motor, problem solving, and personal-social.

I'm always grateful for this group because I feel passively well-informed. I knew by hearing where all your Marchlings are at with language that we are behind, so I'm not surprised. It gives the daycare something that they can focus on helping us with.

So thank you all who share the daily stories and milestones. You helped me go into the meeting with LO's new teachers with a calm and open mind. I know my child's strengths and weaknesses and I don't feel like a failure as a parent. I've been doing the best I can for as long as I could and now I'm so grateful to have more help.

To get kiddo in the carseat when he's having a tantrum or just doesn't wanna, I use all my strength and thankfully our kiddo calms down when we turn the car on. I just remember it's temporary and necessary and do whatever it takes to get him strapped in. DH wanted to turn the carseat around but I'm not sure that would solve the problem.

2/12 - I think the most romantic thing my husband has said to me in awhile: I think LO needs more leisure wear. Haha I was considering getting kiddo some new stuff for his birthday but I love it when it's DH's idea. I hate being the only one managing the kid's inventory. I love it when DH gets involved. I try to keep tight purse strings as much as possible so when my husband gives me the green light to spend, it allows me to feel less guilty about shopping. And there is a consignment sale next weekend.

2/13 - My kid is obsessed with the front door now. He tries to go out multiple times per day. Thank goodness we have a deadbolt but I wish we had one of those screen doors to let the air flow on nice days. How does one childproof them though? So glad to hear your LO is okay. I've been taking LO out there in hopes that he will become familiar enough to find his way home if he ever gets out. Haha can you tell I was a dog-mom for two decades before having an actual human child?

2/17 - New daycare is working out well. It's our 2nd day today. Thanks to all those who encouraged us to make the switch. There was nothing wrong with the other one, but this one is affiliated with our employer and the other one was off-site. It just makes more sense to have kiddo closer if possible. And it's $400 per month cheaper.

We just had a stomach bug rip through our house. Puking Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday. Diarrhea Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. I did so much laundry. By Monday he was eating and drinking lots of water and we sent him back to daycare on Wednesday. They're strict about "no symptoms for 24 hours." I totally get it.

2/27 - Skipped ny workout yesterday to stay home and organize. Shuffling things from home to work and vice versa. Making piles of stuff to give away. Today we will pick up our purchases from an online consignment sale. We gotta make room for the new items.

I had entered my babylist registry in a spreadsheet. It made it easier to share with my younger sister who is having a 2022 Marchling. I calculated the price we paid for things vs if we had bought at full price. We've saved $1500 on babywearing stuff, $1500 on bicycle stuff, $500 on toys and books, $300 on water stuff, $3000 on clothes and shoes, $700 on strollers, etc. All together, we've spent $8000 but we've saved $10,000. I love buying stuff used. Or getting it through Buy Nothing.

I'm not a big spender and I feel like we've bought so many things for LO to get through this pandemic. Since this kid is our "one and done," I want to try everything since I won't get another chance. So as a data nerd, it was fun to look at the numbers and see how much we have saved.

I filed this under self care because seeing how we have managed makes me feel proud of myself. It makes me feel like I am winning at adulting. It liberates me to buy more things that I want, like a silk ring sling to use at the beach this summer. And a "momper" which is a romper for mom.

January 2022 thoughts

1/3 - Milestone Monday - LO is obsessed with numbers and letters. And written words. He loves pointing at them and having me read them outloud. He finds numbers everywhere from the park, to the parking garage, and in my cookbooks. I never realized he was paying attention to those symbols but he is really eager. I am happy but also shocked.

1/4 - Tantrum Tuesday - Ended the evening yesterday with, "I am not your servant!" Directed at DH. It's hard getting back to work after 2 weeks at home. I get it. But he was asking me to bring him everything and leaving messes for me to clean up. I'm adjusting too! And after dealing with LO 24/7 (he's been out of daycare since Dec 8th) I need help and a break. I am hiding in the bedroom now, forcing DH to handle dinner and I just heard LO fall out of his high chair and he's wailing. I'm exhausted.

1/5 - Our little outing today was a mixed bag. I was going to be on time but I went to the wrong park. I got a call from daycare that got me flustered. We arrived at the correct park, LO went to play and I started doing my workout with another mom. LO pooped so we had to stop and change a diaper. Back to workout. Then LO wanted attention and snuggles and to nurse. OK, that was the end of the workout. I guess by typing it all out, it wasn't that bad. Kiddo was smiling and playing kinda independently for a good long while.

On the home front, DH is attending a funeral cross-country this weekend. Last minute planning. I declined to go along. So I'm just praying DH has a safe and normal trip (no canceled flight) and that he doesn't get sick. He has procrastinated getting his flu shot and COVID booster. I'm just like ugh. C'mon man. Do your own adulting. And when you do get sick, who's gonna help me care for LO? Just think about the consequences of your decisions. What if you die of COVID? Because that happens to some people. When can we stop framing COVID as a life/death scenario? Still don't know the cause of death of his friend. It's sad. I didn't attend my grandfather's funeral last month because it was too stressful to do a quick trip. I can't believe DH wanted me and LO to go along with him to the service of someone I've never met. Decisions are so hard to make right now.

1/7 - DH is away for the weekend and I'm home with LO for just 2 more weeks before I go back to teaching. My university is being pretty quiet on the topic of returning to in-person instruction, which is what is planned. I will teach a large (~80 person) lecture. The desks are NOT 6ft apart. I will double mask or get N95's. Who is paying for these glorious masks? Why are they $2-3 apiece? Do I need a new one each day or can they be reused? Will I need a microphone? Do I fill out the health questionnaire every day? Is contact tracing even possible when there is community spread? We get a daily email saying which buildings COVID-positive have used. Will it just say every building every day? Is that even useful info? Wishing now more than ever for the option to keep WFH. Don't know how we'll manage student absences and make-up work. Is it going to be just madness? How can I record each class meeting? I haven't been in a lecture hall since I was in my 2nd trimester with my marchling.

Edit to add: Breaking news is that our university is going to revert to virtual instruction for the first 3 weeks of the Spring semester. We have no details about how this will work and how laboratories and exams will be impacted. This was shared with me by my chair at 10am. So I guess there's that. Also it is sad that we have to buy our own PPE. Our university issued 10 cloth masks back at the start of the pandemic, but I have heard no news about whether they will provide KN95s. I looked on my university's info pages and they haven't been updated since March 2020! There was a forum for professors to swap tips and tricks but I don't think anyone is updating it for how to return to campus.

Oh hell no. I can't with this virus. Is it dangerous or not? With the wide range of mitigation strategies, it's hard to take it seriously. I just went back to my workout group in person this week after taking December off cause LO was sick and we are masking for outdoor, socially distant fitness. It's hard to workout in a mask but I feel better at least trying.

1/9 - Self-Care Sunday - DH is out of town and I've been alone with LO. We're doing all my favorite things. I love it. I realized that when DH is here, I can get so resentful when I feel DH is not doing enough to help me. Now that he's gone, I'm experiencing a level of joy that I haven't felt in a long time. So I guess I'm going to have to try to recreate this feeling when DH returns. Like I was the one creating all the misery. And I realized it. And I'm having so much fun going on dates with LO. And not worrying about keeping costs down. And not counting calories. And not worrying what other people think. Yes my kid might throw a tantrum in public and I can only do so much to keep it from happening, but I'm not going to stay home just because I don't want my kid to have a public meltdown. They end pretty quickly (the tantrums) when kiddo realizes that his crying isn't going to change my mind. We went to a fitness class, played at the park, ate at McDonald's, went to a recovery 12-step meeting in a park, walked and ate at IKEA. It was so fun. Today we're at the zoo.

December was miserable because LO was sick and it was raining so we couldn't go out. But now it's good weather and I'm taking advantage. Lots of steps.

Also I reconfigured my closet. Removed all things I don't wear and got about 30 new tops that I love. Now I can't wait to get dressed for work. One person sold me 100 pieces for $200 so I regifted everything that didn't fit me, which has been really fun.

1/13 - Got a 45 min massage after a workout while kiddo was spending the morning at daycare. Two thoughts: there is nothing wrong with kiddo going to daycare. There is no shame in needing help. You're not a bad mom for sending your child to someone else for a couple of hours.

Prior to that moment, I felt so empty and alone and useless. Hate that I have to work. Just not enjoying getting back into the routine. But maybe once we get going, I won't even notice. The friction of starting a new groove is so painful.

Second, it is ok to do what you need to do. Fill your cup. Paint. Talk with friends and family. Get a cute haircut. Laugh. Dance. I don't remember what it's like not to agonize over everything, every decision, due to this pandemic. But it felt good to have this thought. Maybe I should meditate more often.

I've only had one haircut in 2 years and I'm just not a fan of long hair (on myself). I'm going to spend time with a friend on Monday and try to get a spa appointment for Tuesday. Yes, COVID cases are so common right now, but this is my last week before school resumes, so it's my chance and I am going to take it. As my sister told me, it's like QE... yaaaas qween!

1/16 - Self Care Sunday - I. AM. BUYING. EVERYTHING. I got new shoes for fitness and I'm so happy about it. A new running belt. And registered for a 5k race that I've always wanted to do. A new headband. A new MAMA hat. A new running skirt. A new tank top that says MOM PWR.

I still have body oil leftover from when I was pregnant and trying to avoid stretch marks. I did a leg & foot self massage last night after LO went to sleep. Woke up this morning feeling so awesome. Getting a massage on Tuesday, at a place which has a Women's Spa • Dry & Steam Sauna • Jacuzzi (Cold & Hot) • Clay Room • Ice Room • Salt Room  • Relaxation Room. If you book a massage, you can use all the facilities. I know... Covid. But I need a break.

Daycare has asked us to send a paper face covering but say that LO will not be required to wear it. No cloth masks allowed.

1/17 - Milestone Monday - LO is obsessed with action songs. He loves "Wheels on the Bus" and does all the actions. He does "Let’s Tap" from CoComelon. Stomping and watching what mommy does. It's pretty freaking adorable.

1/18 - Tantrum Tuesday - LO is getting very particular about shoes. He wants to wear them in the house. Or not. He wants to wear them at the park. Or not. He wants to wear a specific pair. After getting dressed, he may want different shoes than whatever I put on him. I guess it's okay but I kinda miss the days where he would just wear whatever I picked out.

He gets a bit testy about taking off a jacket or vest, even when I feel like it's too warm. He likes to wear the monkey harness even though the head of the monkey blocks his view. If I try to take it off, he screams.

1/25 - Napped for 2h with LO yesterday. Such a luxury.

Today I have a 2h block to get work done (or shower) while DH is at work and LO is at daycare. Glorious!

I love my kiddo but he is doing this new shriek when he's not getting attention. It is (hopefully) just a phase. I am sure he's frustrated that he can't express himself. I'm like, dude use your words. And he's like, I can't talk yet, you know this.

LO woke up absolutely screaming in the middle of the night. Maybe he had a nightmare. He was grabbing his legs and feet. Maybe growing pains? I gave Tylenol and rocked in the rocking chair and eventually he went back down. DH even woke up. Haha.

Normally I handle all night wake-ups alone, but this was a whole-house alarm. Part of me was like yeah, welcome hubby, this kid wakes me up 2-3x per night EVERY NIGHT. I have been insulating DH from night wakeups for so long (18 months) by sleeping with LO in the guest room and letting DH get uninterrupted sleep. He's a light sleeper. And he never got to WFH during the pandemic.

1/30 - Self-Care Sunday - We got 4 new tires (all weather) for our minivan. This reduces my anxiety about driving on the freeway in the rain.

I have cut my hair only once since becoming pregnant with LO, so it's longer than it has been in 20 years. I'm learning about the Curly Girl method. It's expensive to buy all new products, but also if I have long hair, I want to do something with it. Kiddo seems kinda past the point of pulling on it for no reason. So far it is looking better and it's only been a week.

How will your lifestyle change once your Marchling has been fully vaccinated?

Right now we are unable to attend concerts indoors, due to the rules of the venue. I would like to try taking kiddo to orchestra, ballet or opera. I know it sounds ridiculous. But the campus performance space reserves 5 performances per year for children and right now they are restricted to age 5 or older. I saw a ballet with LO when he was in the womb in Feb 2020. So yeah I guess that's what I have to look forward to.

38 week check in

I want to do Xmas photos. I want to send Xmas cards. I want to make a wreath out of Eucalyptus branches. I want to vacuum the floors. I want to clean the oven. I want to clean the bathrooms. I want locks on all cabinets and drawers. I want all furniture secured to the walls. I want about 100 hours of childcare so I can get my work done. I want people at work to stop asking me to do extra stuff as if I have more free time than they do. I want to see my sisters and my new nephew Theo. I would love to see friends and their kids and have them meet my kid. I want to bake and decorate a gingerbread house. I want to keep up eating healthy meals and working out with Fit4Mom. I want to get more use out of the jogging stroller. I want to get back into rollerskating. I want to see snow. I want to sew 2 quilts. I want to organize my son's toys. I want to sing Christmas carols with a group. I want to go on a "holiday lights" drive, bike ride or walk. I want to get something for my husband's birthday. I want to be more mindful and do daily meditation. I want to clean out more crap from the closets and garage. I want to repopulate my garden with edible plants. I want to sweep the garage and mop the laminate floors. I want to bathe the dog and trim her nails. I want to get together with my cousin and do a local hike here in the valley. I want to take my son on public transportation, a subway maybe. I want to read a good book. I want to go camping. I want to iron-on the "MOM" patch I got from my secret bumper to my breastfeeding sweatshirt.

Last month

Last month I had decision fatigue. There is about one day every two weeks that I snap at DH and tell him to figure it out himself. He's not allowed to ask me. Like, dude, I'm no expert. Nobody showed me. Also with COVID there were some things I used to do to refresh and restore that I can't do now. Like getting a massage and skating at the roller rink. 😪 I am trying to show up for my online fitness classes, but like you, I have some stuff going on with my body that is undiagnosed. I have pain in my extremities (hands, wrists, feet, ankles) that makes it hard to go "out for a walk" plus it has been 100's of degrees Fahrenheit or poor air quality for weeks. Yet somehow I am managing to do all the cooking and cleaning and taking care of baby and working a part-time job.

Last month, Ha ha. My baby is kind of delayed in rolling, but he can sit unassisted. He doesn't do any other pre-crawling milestones like hands-and-knees, commando, scooting, etc. My mom's fitness group was saying that kids tend to be early walkers OR early talkers. My baby is a chatterbox so I'm betting he's gonna be an early talker. 

Last month, I celebrated the birth of my nephew Theo. I keep a cardboard box in the kitchen and as soon as LO outgrows something, I throw it in the box (clean). When the box is full, I ship it to my sister.

Last month, I wanted to buy stuff online just to have something to look forward to. Like baby Halloween costumes, and silly Christmas outfits. But I am also kind of crafty, thrifty, in to upcycling and hand-me-downs. We plan to go to the beach next weekend but with COVID uncertainty, we haven't made any holiday plans and it's kind of depressing. It was 108 deg F here yesterday, triple digits all week, so we're stuck inside hard-core. Which is probably a contributing factor to my desire for restless spending.

Last month, I felt like it is a struggle to feed purees AND breastmilk, do tummy time AND read/sing and do something for myself AND a little housework in these 2.5 hour wake windows. The days are flying by. I also feel a bit guilty. My mom was here the first 2 weeks of September. She's been gone 3 weeks. The first week after she left I cried EVERY day because I missed the help. DH has been trying to do more these past 2 weeks. He kind of asked me the other day if I noticed his contribution. It has been better but I told him I adjusted so it's fine now. I think he was asking if his help was helping. I don't know if I should have praised him for helping more. But why do dads say they babysit their own kids? That's called parenting when it's yours. Right? I do appreciate the help from him on folding diapers and meal prepping. So why can't I just express that? I think it's because I still have to do the larger share of being with LO. In terms of hours, DH is in charge of LO for 6.5% of the time. That leaves me with LO for 93.5% of the time. I don't know why [this ](https://www.fatherly.com/love-money/parenting-strategies-advice/sharing-parenting-jobs-couples-therapist-advice/) makes me mad.

Last month, feeding Albert a meal takes more like an hour. Setting everything out. Feeding one tiny bite at a time. Cleaning up. Drinking water practice included. I have started thinking of it as a meal we eat together. I alternate bites for him and bites for me. Or bites for him while I exercise. My baby is a slow eater I guess.

Last month I felt clutter fatigue. I am sick of all the brightly colored plastic crap around the house. For context, I had a kinda miminalist tiny house life before baby, complete with eco-friendly car-free commute. I am now a suburban-living minivan-driving buyer of toys for my little monster. We do get used toys, but they pile up along with the bassinet and infant carseat that we've outgrown. The recycling centers are closed due to COVID and I am fully fantasizing about throwing a bunch of stuff to the curb. Send photos of your organization porn. Any minimalist mamas out there want to brag?

Last month, MIL made a comment disparaging teachers. She implied that teachers "don't want to work" and that's why they are teaching remotely. She asked if I am still being paid the same amount now that we are virtual. She asked if the students get a discounted tuition. As if online instruction is a choice. As if schools that are face-to-face haven't had COVID outbreaks. As if virtual instruction is effortless. As if the value of live instruction via Zoom is less than the value of being "on campus." It hurts because I'm a teacher. It hurts because I am working as hard as ever. Students have said that having both live lectures and access to high-quality recordings has been a game-changer. We teachers still plan lessons. We teachers still assign and grade the same homework. We teachers still hold office hours. The only thing we don't do is the commute (less driving/use of transit = better air quality and lower COVID risk). I fully appreciate how difficult it is for working parents who are now supervising their children's online instruction at home. COVID has been disruptive for EVERYONE IN THE WORLD. I can imagine as a working parent the relief of sending a child to school. But I get defensive when people imply that teachers are just being lazy and not wanting to work. We're already pretty underpaid. We're already doing more by learning how to be our own audio engineers, lighting experts, transitioning our content into a virtual medium, trying to create rapport with students through Zoom and email. We're doing a lot of things we've never done before (which takes extra time). To suggest that we should be paid less is more than mildly insulting.

Last month, we had a good time at the beach. Super big thanks to Ashley Maddox for posting her beach packing list.

⭐umbrella/tent

⭐chairs

⭐towel/blanket

⭐WATER!!! 

⭐rash guard bathing suit

⭐floppy hat 

⭐sunscreen

⭐sand toys

⭐baby carrier

⭐baby pool

We used everything on this list and we were "on the sand" for 3 hours. Baby took 2 naps. One in the carrier and one in the tent. We reapplied sunscreen midway. Nobody got burned. Adults had PB&J sandwiches.

Last month, I bought some dorky outfits! I know I'm not the World's best photographer but I plan to do the photos here at home. This [video](https://www.facebook.com/295199098300/posts/10158215666078301/) was my inspiration.

Last month, we went to the beach on Saturday with MIL. So tired we didn't unpack the car until Sunday. DH was watching LO while I was in class Tuesday night and realized we forgot to put the changing mat in the diaper bag. We had a disposable puddle pad and a recieving blanket so we used those. To me it was no big deal but DH got insanely upset. We went to bed angry on Tuesday night. Wednesday night we talked it out and I recalled the last time LO was changed. I was standing outside our vehicle and LO was on the front passenger seat. DH said he guessed I put the changing pad under the seat, he went out to the car and found it. I thought he was mad about the lost changing pad because of work stress but it turns out it is a combination of him being anxious about dealing with poop and being paranoid about being out and about with LO and not having the supplies necessary for diaper changes. He rightly reminded me that I am primarily home with LO and he takes the baby out while I WFH. I thought it was a strange thing to be upset about especially since we have another changing pad and LOTS of puddle pads and recieving blankets. DH is usually so willing to throw money at a problem, i.e. just buy another one. I couldn't understand why he would be so worked up. TLDR: we resolved the issue but it took 24 hours.

Last month, I looked in the mirror and saw my C-section scar. My belly used to overhang so much that I didn't see the scar, so I guess that's progress? I have for better or for worse been doing Zoom fitness classes 3-4x per week. In the beginning, starting 3 weeks after LO was born, it was more for community than for a workout. I modify what I don't feel comfortable doing. I did exercises for diastasis recti instead of whatever ab stuff they were doing. It's been 3 months of specific diastasis recti work and I feel my core is stronger. I feel my whole body is stronger. I used to wear LO during the workouts otherwise he would cry. He's now good with jumping or hanging out in his swing or high chair. I had to grab a 12 lb medicine ball because I missed having the extra weight. My instructor said she had to wear one of her kids until about 7 months and that's where we're at so I guess that's also a win. We got a bicycle helmet for LO and a seat attached, but I don't know if he is developmentally ready or physically strong enough to go for a bike ride. We've done two short outings and he cries when we hit bumps. I don't want to hurt his little body and it is illegal to ride on the streets with a child less than 1 year. I was a runner like 5 years ago but I'm afraid to run now because breastfeeding and my feet hurt so much. I am hoping to get back to outdoor stuff when summer is over. This week, we're under a heat advisory again, until 5pm Friday due to triple digit temperatures (Fahrenheit).

Last month, I realized babies had to be put down for naps. I didn't know about this. I guess I thought they would just get tired and conk out. I feel like managing baby's schedules for diapers, feeding, exercise, learning and sleeping is a full-time job. Dang I was so naïve.

Last month, These just arrived today. ❤❤❤ > I love. I feel so much better. Nicewin
Arch Support Brace for Men & Women Elastic Copper Bandage Foot Care Brace for Pain Relief of Plantar Fasciitis, Heel Spurs, Flat Feet

Last month, we went to the Farmer's Market to get fresh produce and the grocery store to pick up meat & dairy. We were winning at meal prep.

Last month, I got a baby break from 2am - 3:30am and got some deep sleep. My husband supervised LO instead of me. DH says to me this morning at 5:50am just before he heads off to work... maybe one day LO will sleep independently in his pack & play. I was like, watch out what you hope for. Hope is a dangerous thing. I just don't think my baby is that type of baby. Maybe other babies do it, maybe not, but I don't want to risk fantasizing about something like that. But I do understand how that sounds like an attractive prospect. I just don't want to dwell on wishful thinking because I don't want to resent my baby for what he can't or won't do. Or maybe what he isn't doing yet. Also, I noticed my wrists don't hurt anymore. So I now have the answer to my question of "how long after baby is born will I have carpal tunnel?" The answer is 7 months. Some baby-related stuff is really annoying and produces anxiety because there are so many questions and so few answers. Or the answer is: it depends. Or the answer is: it's different for every mom. I feel like I can deal with a situation if I know it's temporary. If I feel like it will never end, I lose hope and start to dwell on despair. I was reading that the breasts may continue to produce milk for year(s) after your baby is no longer nursing. So I guess the mysteries of my body will continue to unfold.

Last month, I wondered why my husband INSISTS on talking to me while I'm trying to get LO to fall asleep. I feel like I've told him a million times that verbalization (words) make LO's ears and brain perk up, which is the opposite of him falling asleep. I hum and rock but I won't even sing songs with words or read a story because it winds the baby up instead of calming him down. DH doesn't seem to understand this, or he just doesn't care. He keeps talking to me and I shoosh him and he gets mad and keeps on talking and asking me stuff and we end up madder and madder at each other. Whyeee? Can't we just agree that if the baby is on his way to sleep we can talk later?

Last month, we got some childproofing underway FINALLY!!!! My WFH setup is in the main room and it was an absolute mess of cables. With the way this baby grabs everything within reach, I know the second he can crawl that desk will be a target for LO.

Last month, I realized that I used to be a total hater when it came to spelling and grammar. Like if someone turned in an assignment with a bunch of typos, run-on sentences, fragments, disarrayed paragraphs, etc. I would think, "What is with this person? Don't they use spellcheck? Why can't they proofread and see that this doesn’t make sense?" Now that I type everything one-handed on 4 hours of sleep, I'm so forgiving. I'm like wow, that was a good try. I think I know what you meant. There are lots of unexpected ways my son has changed me as a person.

Last month, we cleaned the house on Friday and Saturday. Got our flu shots (mom, dad and baby) last week. Cooked a big meal with leftovers yesterday. We walked a leisurely 5k (mom, dad, baby and doggo) and ate lunch at a hot dog stand. 🌭🌭🌭🌭🌭 👨‍👩‍👦 🐩 The weather here was perfect, overcast and cool. It really felt like we did something significant. Also randomly crossed paths with two separate professor friends. It was nice to see other adults.

Last month, my husband stepped it up after I apologized to him for "rage cleaning." I have a verbally-abusive mom. She would name-call all of us every time she was cleaning up the house. Called us lazy and useless and worse. I delayed starting a family because I was afraid of being like that. I get into that headspace every so often, but I don't say it outloud. I just get upset and quiet and kind of slam things a bit more than I would if I weren't upset. I waited until I wasn't upset. DH actually said that he would've waited a couple more days to do the cleaning but he would have done it eventually. He said, "it wasn't like I was trying to wait you out." So I told him that I already had consciously waited 24 hours to see if he would lift a finger and that's why I was upset when I finally did it myself. Backstory: He invited his dad over for a formal meal on Saturday and so I was hoping he would take the initiative to cook and clean because it was a special occasion that he had initiated. I designated DH as the "boss" of the event. He was in charge of all meal planning, shopping, cooking, cleaning. I said that I would assist but not be "in charge." I suffer from decision fatigue as it is with LO and I just didn't need a special occasion on top of everyday baby-rearing. Sometimes I think the tables need to be turned or the shoe put on the other foot for us to appreciate each other. Two weekends ago, I did all the shopping and it was exhausting. DH does all the "outside of the house" tasks so that includes shopping. It helped me appreciate the energy required for that task which I haven’t been doing since covid times began / baby was born.

Last month, I got $125 worth of toys for $17.25 at the CastaIc consignment sale. It's kind of unbelievable that I'm so bad at choosing toys that are at an appropriate developmental level. The way toys are sold is in bundles so if you want one specific thing, often you get 3 things you didn't necessarily want. Since they're all out of the box they have to be cleaned. Also I look them up to see how to clean and the age range. I then sort them into bins by age and put away anything LO isn't ready for. I guess even with all that, it's a good deal. Bench with 3 bins for $30 for toy [organization](https://imgur.com/gallery/PD7TgEi).

Song archive

List

Itsy bitsy spider

Old McDonald

The farmer in the dell

One two, buckle my shoe

Working on the railroad

The ants go marching

Over the rainbow

5 little ducks

5 green and speckled frogs

Monkeys jumping on the bed

Ten in the bed

Song that never ends

BINGO

The muffin man

The wheels on the bus

The riddle song

Baa baa black sheep

Mary had a little lamb

Head shoulders knees toes

Frère Jacques

Hush little baby

🇪🇦 Dans mon pays d’Espagne olé 🎼🎵🎶

🌞 Soleil

🏔 Montagne

🌊 La Mer

🐮 Un Taureau

🤠 Un Chanteur

🎸 Une Guitare

💃 Des Danseuse

🕺🐃 Des Corridas

🦐 Des Paellas 

🕺💃 Du Flamenco 

🐚 Des Conchitas

https://t.co/eUh9hM1T3L 

#French #Spain #babymusic #kidsmusic #childrensmusic