running nightmare

I had my first (but probably not last) running nightmare last night. I was doing a half marathon with my friend who I used to run with in college. She was always stronger and faster than me. We got 4 miles into the race and for some reason I was running with all this baggage. Like a vest, a belt, a wagon filled with backpacks and stuff. So we had to stop because they forgot to sing the national anthem before we started. We all filled an auditorium and had to sit there for like 45 minutes while all our muscles were getting cold and we had to wait for the choir to arrive. I was complaining to my friend all these minutes.

So the choir finally gets up on stage and the announcer calls my friend to the stage to lead the song. I felt so bad for complaining because I didn't know it was going to be my friend up on stage. So then when it was over, I stayed around until everyone left because I was for some reason cleaning up the auditorium and waiting for my friend to say goodbye to all the singers. Then we finally got going and my friend says, hurry up we gotta get back out there before it starts raining. So we ran another mile and at a water stop my wagon fell apart. We were in another state from where I live, and apparently, I was not familiar with the course. My friend lives in Wisconsin.

So I tried to put the wagon back together but I didn't have the instructions. We saw a packing and shipping place where we could put the whole thing in a box and ship it back to my house, but the cost of doing that was more than the cost of the wagon. My friend goes, hurry up it's about to start raining. So I grabbed my raincoat, left my wagon at the shipping place and started running again. I asked my friend how we were going to meet up with her husband and kids after the race and she was like, I have no idea. I asked her, don't you use Strava beacon or have some way to track each other, she's like no.

We keep running and it starts raining so we put on our raincoats and then she goes, yeah it's about to get super hilly. And at that point I guess I had enough so I woke myself up. It was one of those dreams where it feels so real, when you wake up, you're not sure if you were really in Wisconsin. So far, we have decided NOT to do the Disneyland 5k in 2025 and I have registered for the LA Marathon. I think this is my brain's way of processing a worst-case scenario.

Farewell Magic Key

Now it's time to say goodbye to all our company, M-I-C-K-E-Y........M-O-U-S-E. And it's time to say goodbye to our magic key. It's not that we didn't love it—we loved it. But our kiddo is outgrowing it. He's getting too interested in buying candy and toys, and it's getting out of hand. It's impossible to get out of the parks without a meltdown. Either that or spend more than $100 daily on food and souvenirs.

See Also https://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2023/11/fun-month-boring-month.html

Magic Key #1 ($400)

• 5/16/22 Disneyland - Kayla
• 5/31/22 DCA - Kayla
• 8/22/22 Disneyland - Kayla
• 8/23/22 DCA - Kayla
• 9/12/22 Disneyland - Kayla
• 12/15/22 Disneyland - Kayla

Magic Key #2 ($450)

• 1/13 Disneyland - Mike + Kayla
• 1/14 DCA - Mike + Kayla

Magic Keys #3 & 4 ($900)

• 3/20/23 Disneyland - Mike + Kayla + Albert
• 5/15/23 DCA - Kayla + Albert
• 5/16/23 Disneyland - Kayla + Albert
• 8/21/23 Disneyland solo - Kayla
• 11/8/23 DCA - Mike + Kayla + Albert
• 1/11/24 RunDisney weekend - Mike + Kayla + Albert
• 1/12/24 RunDisney weekend - Mike + Kayla + Albert
• 2/9/24 Disneyland - Kayla + Albert
• 3/19/24 Disneyland - Kayla + Albert

Kayla (visited the parks 17 x $154 = $2618), which is a savings of $1,768 by having a magic key.

Mike (visited the parks 6 x $154 = $924), which is a savings of $474 by having a magic key.

Albert (visited the parks 8 x $154 = $1232), which is a savings of $782 by having a magic key.

• So, as a family, we saved $3,024 over two years.

Or you can think of it as $2,708 of unnecessary spending (giving our money to Disneyland)

• 17 x $100 = $1,700 on average daily spending (to Disneyland for treats and trinkets)
• 17 x $30 = $510 for parking (to the city of Anaheim or Disneyland) 

Not to mention the spending on Genie+ every now and then and hotels for the days that we stayed the night nearby at either Element Anaheim or the La Quinta near the GardenWalk. These calculations were done using $154 as an average daily ticket price. It could be more or less per day depending on the day of the week and the time of the year. 

The price of gas was surprisingly less than the admission, but still leaves a carbon footprint.

• 60 miles x 17 x 2 x 20 mpg x $6 per gal = $612

For my sister's visit this year, I have already purchased 2 x Ages 3+ ($275.00 each) = $91.67 per day per person for myself and Albert. Mike won't be going. Disneyland offers So-Cal Resident tickets occasionally, giving you a discount on regular ticket prices. And those tickets have fewer blackout dates than the Magic Keys. It seemed to have fewer blackout dates recently, even Fridays were available.

• Mike had a 3-day SoCal resident ticket = $249 for Aug 22-23 2022 + Sept 12 2022
• For Mike's 50th Bday Extravaganza we bought 1 ticket = $159 for Dec 15 2022
• $159 + $249 = $408, which is equivalent to 1 magic key

So I guess it would have been economical (or at least at a break even point) for Mike to have a Magic Key the first year too.

My sister and I have decided that May 2024 may be our last epic trek to Disneyland with the two cousins Evelyn and Albert. At least for a couple of years. Here is our spending from this most recent visit with just Albert and I to bid farewell to our magic keys.

• $5.50 cotton candy
• $6.99 dole whip
• $17.93 Bengal BBQ
• $12.58 cafe daisy
• $6.67 watermelon slush
• $5.92 cutie fruit 
• $7.26 lollipops 
• $30 for parking
• $10 for a new cars toy = $102.85

My dear husband encourages me to create the "Disneyland at home" experience going forward. We have a silly humidifier, as an aroma dispenser, in each of our 3 bathrooms. I have dozens of different Disney-themed scents. I have my Disneyland cookbook. We have Disney+ on the TV. And there are endless streets to walk here in the valley. I can always find something interesting to look at if that's what I need to do (lots of walking).

I always say that everyone needs a hobby. And Disneyland was kind of my hobby for awhile. Learning about it, going there, doing debriefs, researching cost-cutting measures, packing and revising packing lists. It was all kind of my hobby for a couple years. It was a great family-friendly place to go while Albert was young.

I guess I'm transitioning my hobby from Disneyland to running. Altogether, the races I have planned for the next year are just under what the Magic Key would cost, if you don't count the LA Marathon. I want to sign up for that one, at the current price, to save money, of course, but also to give me the commitment to say that I'm doing a marathon next year.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Kayla Kaiser (@hamerk02)

LA Big 5k 2024 Race Report

 

The LA Big 5k was great! My favorite was the last mile and the finish. It was a fast course with hills and trees. It started and ended in Dodger Stadium with views of the LA skyline at sunrise and traversed the arboretum of Elysian Park. I was grateful to a man running in front of me for the first mile who was blasting some good music. I didn't bring headphones or a speaker so I relied on the ambient noise to entertain me through the race. During the second mile, I was very aware of the uneven pavement and I was focused on not tripping. I skipped the water stop.

The event was well-organized. There were about 8000 runners in the 5k. Parking was free. The race is organized by the McCourt Foundation and Mr. Frank McCourt was the owner of the Los Angeles Dodgers and Dodger Stadium from 2004 to 2012. In 2008, McCourt bought the operating rights to the Los Angeles Marathon. In 2019, he donated the Los Angeles Marathon to his Foundation. The post-race expo was outside, and more than 60 vendors were present. It had big marathon energy because it was part of the LA Marathon weekend.

 
The weather was great, it felt chilly at the start but was ideal while running (48-54 deg F, partly cloudy, 1-4 mph wind). I sported my new Mama shirt and new Freya Women's Dynamic Wireless Sports Bra. I had on arm-warmers and my CRZ YOGA Women's Naked Feeling Biker Shorts - 8 Inch inseam. High Waisted Workout Yoga Gym Running Spandex Shorts Side Pockets X-Large in the color they call Savannah which is kind of a terra cotta. I love the pockets.

I had my Nathan Trail Mix running belt with only one water bottle. It was handy to have the running belt to collect the post-race snacks. They gave us fruit snacks, chips, banana, electrolyte drink, Pocky, some kind of granola bar. I felt so salty after drinking all the electrolyte samples at the race expo on Friday and the chips they gave us were super salty too. Before the race, I had french toast sticks between 4-5am and then 4 egg whites between 6-7am. I didn't drink much water before the race, but I drank about 20 oz after.

Overall, I wanted to report that I tried to do too much this weekend. I almost cried today during my cross-training workout (a group fitness class with Fit4Mom). It went by so fast, I wasn't able to be fully present for any of it. I wasn't able to accurately document all of it. I was hoping to get photos of every person who attended Albert's birthday party, but it was too hard. And I don't think anyone took a photo of me, so it kind of became a blur.

I might be crazy, but I just spent the better part of today entering in mileage for my workouts for the next year. My training buddies said they might want to run the full marathon next year, and I was wondering how that would fit with the runs I already have planned. It wasn't too difficult to fit it all in, actually. But the thought of running 15 miles continuously is very intimidating right now.

I ordered another Coast-to-Coast Bounce Back Back Travel Kit from Fluffy Fizzies because I love the sugar scrub, the body butter, the massage bar, and the massage oil. If I ordered them separately, it would be the same price or more expensive than buying the bundle. And the travel kit comes in a super-cute clear zip bag. I have yet to try the bath bombs, and that's the first thing I wanted to try when I originally placed my order. The website says that the bath bombs dissolve in hot or cold water so it could be for a bath or just a foot soak. I'm not sure I would use the compressed towels on my face, but maybe on my feet after a treatment to prevent slipping and falling.

I have yet to try the Samsung Galaxy Watch that was gifted to me by a friend. I don't know what features it has that would help my training. St. Patty's Day had me thinking I need a lime green sparkle skirt. We need to bring back the Tinkerbell half!

Thank you Rise and Run Podcast for all the training tips and motivation.

https://www.womensrunning.com/training/why-you-should-write-a-race-report/

• The event itself: Where? How long? When? Weather?
• Course description and evaluation of event logistics
• How you trained for the event
• Your gear and nutrition
• Specific experiences (this might include)
  • Thoughts at every mile
  • Mantras you may have used
  • Falls (if any—always entertaining)
  • Conversations you’ve had with others
  • Conversations you’ve had with yourself
• DNF experience (if applicable) OR
• Your finish and associated emotions
• Your overall evaluation of the event

Pirate Life 4 Me

 

Albert's "A Pirate's Life 4 Me" birthday party has come and gone. Also known as the Pasadena Pirate Party in the Park, we had 13 adults + 10 kids attend.

Guest List

Anthony, Mika, Lucas, Emma, Eli (neighbors)
Larry, Victoria, Samantha, Steven, Sarah (neighbors)
Vishwa, Danushka, Summer, Mia, Oliver (friends from grad school)
Christiana, Jeremy, Annika (friends from grad school)
Gil, April, Connie (friends from high school)
Sally, Robert (Albert's grandparents)

Games we did play

Treasure/scavenger hunt
Ring toss on sword
Pirate puzzle
Frisbee to treasure chest
Beanbag to sea turtle
Name that pirate

Games we didn't play

Sharks and minnows
Treasure transfer by toes
Popsicle stick + pool noodle boats
Cannonball bowling
Walk the plank
Eye spy
Dress-up / photo booth

Prizes / giveaways

Chocolate coins
Ring pops
Pirate Booty

Leprechaun gold

Packing List

beach wagon

large plates

cake toppers from Jake and the Never Land Pirates

#4 candle + lighter for candles

table cloth + decorations to hang

paper towels + paper towel holder

small dessert napkins

small dessert cake plates 

cutlery / party straws

music / speaker

solo cups

small paper "snack" cups

serving utensils incl knife, tongs, spoons

drinks (Capri Sun, water, mini soda cans) 

Stuff we brought but didn't use

guest book / baby book

party favors (goodie bags)

pirate dress-up costumes

pirate coloring pages

Budget

$15.41 for ice
$43.48 for 1/4 sheet cake
$121.09 for drinks and candy and chips / pirate booty
$15.32 for Albert's pirate t-shirt
$18.60 for parrot and hat
$25 for women's and girl's costume and hat
$28 for men's costume
$280 for rice, noodles and egg rolls
$8.54 for gold coins
$12.40 for table cloth, decorations, plates, cups
$3.60 for pirate loot (coins, jewels, and treasure chest)

$571.44 total

There will be other expenses, such as printing the photo for his baby book. And I want to send a couple of boxes of party supplies to his younger cousins so that they can recreate the party if the want to. Albert had been bothering us for a "Spiderman cake" for weeks so we gave in and got it for him. It cost $45.99 for ice cream cake (day prior to his birthday, and four days prior to his party). I could have sworn that I'd made an itemized spending report for his prior birthday parties, but I can't find it now.

The good news is that we have a family set of pirate costumes that we can use for Halloween either this year or in the future. Albert was stoked to be surrounded by "friends" and "best friends" and he loved opening presents and packages. He's still breastfeeding and wanted to nurse in the 15 minutes just before his guests arrived, but I didn't wear a nursing bra so I said no. He didn't throw a fit or anything.

Albert had THE MOST FUN playing in the sandbox with other kids and running around the playground looking out of the cannons. The older kids got a kick out of the skills games using the beanbags (which I bought for his party last year but didn't really use back then). They did great with the ring toss and frisbee too. All the kids had fun with the scavenger hunt, and it was great to give them that project right at the start of the party so they had an idea of the layout of the park and where everything was and how to find their way back to our picnic table.

I brought three pairs of pants and he blew out the knees of two of them, he played so hard. We brought his scooter and helmet which he mainly used to get to and from the car. Unfortunately there was a swim meet that day at the Rose Bowl Aquatics Center so it was tricky to find parking. I thought for sure some of our friends wouldn't make it because they were sick or had a time conflict, but everyone we invited actually showed up. We sent them home with chocolate and Pirate Booty and leftovers from the rice and noodles. We ate all the egg rolls and all the cake.

Birth https://photos.app.goo.gl/xZjjYskCYCS7iw9Q9

Turning One https://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2021/03/i-have-1-year-old.html 

Turning Two https://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2022/03/february-2022-thoughts.html

https://photos.google.com/share/AF1QipMY5PczOurgMSx0Q7F56YP_k0wh993qNOkUuG1AqfVIW8AiwJXIQ5HSnOa9K5JSCQ

Turning Three https://bitchonabike.blogspot.com/2023/03/post-birthday-blues.html

          https://photos.app.goo.gl/dYa8buWaMcUf6tBd9

Turning Four https://photos.app.goo.gl/twvKCtcEhdhzxpCp9

RunClub

We're nearing the finish line of my first time coaching RunClub+ with my local Fit4Mom franchise "West SFV."

To what extent have you met your RunClub goals?

I would say 2 out of 5. I initially summarized my goals "Keep up with kiddo. Slim down. Balance mood." In longer form, I said "I joined RunClub+ because my kid loves to run and momma's gotta keep up. Also, I feel I've tried every workout that Fit4Mom offers to slim down and I just can't seem to lose the weight I gained while breastfeeding. I've had success with running in the past so I wanted to try it again. Plus running is a great mood balancer for me."

I did experience an initial dip in weight during week 3 of the program, which was good because I had been training for already 16 weeks by then and I was starting to get depressed that it wasn't working. But I've gained back a bit and hit a plateau now it seems. I'm not too upset about it because it seems like my panniculus has shrunk. I feel so grateful for that. It seems like the fat above my belly button is still pretty dense, but at least I can feel like I've made some progress. The C-section scar was such a source of unhappiness for me, having less of an overhang in that area makes me so happy.

Strangely, my mom rage kind of got worse during the program, especially in weeks 2 and 3. I think it was stressful adding "one more thing" into my weekly routine. I felt pressured to do my runs while still doing all of my regular job and my tasks at home. It was hard to balance. Maybe the running has given me more energy, but rather than feeling centered, I felt really off balance. I didn't feel grounded, I felt like I needed more support to keep everything in perspective.

Which components of the program supported your progress? (Select all that apply)

Daily reach-outs (WhatsApp), Weekly emails, Recipes, In-person group runs, Client guide, Weekly running journal, Coach's YouTube videos, Coach's texts/emails, F4M on demand, F4M in-person classes, The finish line (LA 5k). 

Obviously, for me, I took advantage of all these components. I think the training plan was the #1 most valuable. I used the client guide a lot, very often, when thinking about what running gear I needed and the warm-up and cool-down. I never used the weekly running journal, but instead kept my own journal in a Google sheet. I enjoyed making the YouTube videos, I enjoyed sending the daily reach-outs. I enjoyed reading the weekly emails, and I did try all of the suggested recipes. 

It was stressful for me to plan and execute the in-person group runs. I felt insecure about the warm-up and I worried a lot about the route being stroller-friendly and how to keep a group of women together when they run at different paces and have different training goals. But I think I did benefit from participating in the group runs, they encouraged me to run faster than I would have alone. I did use the "on-demand" workouts by Fit4Mom, but it wasn't essential. I did 3 workouts from the Fit4Mom on-demand and 6 from my own library. I did attend weekly Fit4Mom in-person classes, so that was definitely essential for me. 

I'm really looking forward to the "finish line." I wouldn't say I'm not nervous at all. I'm nervous. I feel extra pressure that I won't be able to run the entire time. I feel like we might all get lost and separated from each other. I want to get finish-line photos of each finisher with their medals, and I'm not sure it will be possible.

What about RunClub+ surprised you or did not match your expectations (whether positive or negative)? You can share your general reflections here.

I was surprised that I asked my husband to rearrange his schedule to accommodate my workouts. I was surprised that he said yes, okay. I'm surprised I could stick with my plan and keep at it even when I got sick or didn't feel like it or when we had lots of rain this year. I was surprised that my participants hit a slump mid-program but are trying to finish strong. I'm surprised they want to do it again, even though they weren't engaged steadily throughout the program. 

I am surprised that I actually enjoyed participating in the daily reach-outs, and it felt like Fit4Mom was reaching out to me, too. I hope the other sessions go as well as this one did. I'm not sure I could have created that content independently, even though I did create some original content.

• Week 1 Homework https://youtu.be/23DpBu4txrM?si=0foCPnfJJUyC2xWP
• Route Planning https://youtu.be/An6d_B6uesE?si=4rn6BmXUMLmQQYVU
• Strava Beacon https://youtu.be/xTb_wBuZ1_8?si=q_Bl9IFCuTLBl1pY
• ABC Quick Check https://youtu.be/V6sjDntlZj4?si=7GveTt536VVQ8NSL
• Slo Mo Jump https://www.tiktok.com/@hamerk02/video/7339262637168954666
• LA Big 5k Course https://youtu.be/uK_jnZRleKY?si=6qWT8j9lt76815es

I'm surprised that I actually look forward to two-mile Tuesdays. It might be my favorite day of the week.

More specifically, what suggestions do you have to improve session 2 (April, May, June)?

Maybe a video about Cycle Syncing (adapting your training schedule to your menstrual cycle).

https://www.runnersworld.com/women/a42699204/training-during-menstrual-cycle

Maybe a tutorial video on Fitbit or Samsung or Garmin or NikeRunClub Apps.

Maybe a tutorial on how/why to do a magic mile and how to determine what walk-run interval to use. And how run/walk might help you go faster.

Maybe a video on Acceleration Gliders (AG) or Cadence Drills (CD). Or what is the purpose of the sprints? Or why are some days "easy" and some "steady" and some are "tempo." What is active recovery and what is not?

I would like a tutorial on how and why to keep a training journal. I could be more organized in keeping and sharing the routes on Google Maps, Google Docs, and Google Sheets. According to "Half Marathon: A Complete Training Guide for Women" by Jeff and Barbara Galloway these are some parameters you can include in your training journal. I also added suggestions from my aunt Anne.

• Distance
• Temperature
• Pace
• Route
• Time of day
• Heart rate (pulse)
• Humidity
• Running time (duration)
• Elevation change (ft)
• Walk/run frequency
• Special segments (hills)
• Company (friends)
• Terrain (trail or pavement)
• Overall vibe (1-10)
• Yucky or Yummy breast milk?
• Empty or full stomach (time since last meal)
• Nutrition during training segment
• Fluid amount during / after
• Bowel movement / GI distress?

These are the pieces of data that I collected this time. I only added Route/Course after the fact.

	Wk	Date	Dist (mi)	Duration (H:MM:SS)	Pace (min/mi)	Split (run/walk)	Route/Course
S	0	1/14/24	6.85	2:49:00	24.8	walk only	Wilbur/Kenya/SanFernandoMission/Lindley/Superior
M	0	1/15/24	5.51	2:18:00	25	walk only	PorterRanchDr/Sesnon/Tampa/Rinaldi
T	0	1/16/24	1.85	0:27:00	15	30/20	Topanga / Vanowen / Owensmouth
F	0	1/19/24	0	0	0	?	-
S	1	1/21/24	0	0	0	didn't feel like it	-
T	1	1/23/24	2.14	0:30:33	14.25	run only	Two Mile Tuesday
F	1	1/26/24	3.24	0:48:29	15	30/20 uphills	Porter Ranch / Sesnon
S	2	1/28/24	3.33	0:51:41	15.5	run only	Chatsworth Park South
T	2	1/30/24	2.5	0:35:43	14.25	run only	Two Mile Tuesday
F	2	2/2/24	3.5	0:51:53	14.8	run only	CSUN / Zelzah
S	3	2/4/24	3.45	0:51:01	14.75	6m run/1m walk	CSUN / G3 Parking Structure
T	3	2/6/24	0	0:46:00	0	12 d of Xmas	Two Mile Tuesday
F	3	2/9/24	9	1:19:00	21	Disneyland!
S	4	2/11/24	4	1:04:36	15.75	mostly walk	Mason Park
T	4	2/13/24	2.22	0:32:11	14.5	40/20 when it got hard	Two Mile Tuesday
F	4	2/16/24	3	0:44:00	14.9	40/20, 90/20	CSUN / Zelzah
S	5	2/18/24	4.5	1:11:23	15.8	6m run/1m walk	CSUN / Zelzah
W	5	2/21/24	2	0:32:00	-	didn't feel like it	across campus
F	5	2/23/24	4.5	1:04:00	14.2	run only	CSUN / Zelzah
S	6	2/25/24	7.5	1:30:00	12	bicycle only	CicLAvia ~ Melrose
T	6	2/27/24	2.23	0:32	14.5	run only	Two Mile Tuesday
F	6	3/1/24	5	1:15:00	15	run only	Dearborn Park / Sherwood Forest
S	7	3/3/24	3.85	1:02:00	16.3	mostly walk	Dearborn Park / Sherwood Forest
T	7	3/5/24	2	0:35:00	14.5	6m run/1m walk	Two Mile Tuesday
F	7	3/8/24	6.6	1:49:58	16.5	random as hell	Porter Ranch / Sesnon
S	8	3/10/24	3	0:46:53	14.5	run only until the hill	Porter Ranch / Sesnon
T	8	3/12/24	3	0:42:08	14	run only	Big Block
F	8	3/15/24	0
		RACE DAY!

Conclusion

I am happy, I love my Brooks Ariel shoes. I got two new sports bras from Freya and one from Enell. I think it's important to continue to support the milk makers. I got a Muzen portable speaker, because I saw one rollergirl had one at CicLAvia and it was incredibly small and light while being incredibly loud, but maybe I should have gotten the Noxgear one. I got myself a massager, which I tend to use on Friday after my long run while waiting for my kid to finish his 50-minute speech therapy.

women's history month

I am sitting here in office hours and before this I was staring at my reflection in the mirror and I was struck by how I don't look like a professor. I mean, when I think of a professor, I think of someone wearing a tweed suit with suede elbow patches in an imposing leather chair. But I'm wearing jeans, sneakers and a lularoe shirt. Partly because I live in California, and I don't think tweed is something that gets worn here ever due to the weather being so nice. But partly because the dress code here at CSUN isn't a thing. Some people dress like they just rolled out of a dumpster. Which is fine by me. 

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Kayla Kaiser (@hamerk02)

Pinterest thinks my fashion style is Dark Academia, which I didn't even know was a thing. But it is kind of how I picture a professor dressing.

When I worked at Claremont, I did wear clothing that could be classified as Dark Academia, but it was certainly more colorful than this. I don't wear muted colors very often.

I'm thinking about Women's History Month and the contributions of women to academia and STEM fields. I'm thinking about why more women don't want to enter academia or if they do, sometimes how they get pushed out. I'm thinking about my own biases and concepts of what a professor should look like and how it causes me to feel some cognitive dissonance when I AM a professor but my reflection in the mirror doesn't look like what I think a professor SHOULD look like. It's a mind trip!

I'm thinking of classism, sexism, racism, homophobia, and wage gaps. I'm thinking of how teachers are expected to make teaching their vocation, excluding any possibility of having a life outside of work. How we are expected to work all the time, making it difficult to balance raising a family and maintaining friendships.

https://www.cta.org/about-us/history

Expectations of society: You may not dress in bright colors, dye your hair, or wear short skirts. You must clean the schoolhouse. You can't leave town. You can't go on dates or go downtown. You have to go to bed early. You can not have a spouse. Yeah. I've read that teachers were once highly paid, but then someone got the great idea to let women do it, and the reason was that women would do more work for less pay than men.

I'm not even sure what the point of this blog post is, but I know I watched the movie "Nyad" last night and it was so powerful. She was so determined and didn't accept that she wasn't strong or young enough to do something that had never been done before. And she was willing to fail hugely before succeeding even though society wasn't very supportive of sponsoring someone her age.

I just have to remember that I AM MAKING HISTORY right now. By existing as a woman in STEM. By wearing bright colors as a teacher. By providing an alternative to the pale male and stale professor tropes for the next generation, to possibly see themselves in acadmia. Like Diana Nyad, I'm doing it.